


You Can STAY

by bluesunggod



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bookstore, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Bad Boy Seo Changbin, Bang Chan & Lee Felix are Related, Bang Chan & Lee Felix are Siblings, Bang Chan & Seo Changbin are Best Friends, Character Death, Dancer Lee Minho | Lee Know, Everyone Loves Yang Jeongin | I.N, Felix is baby, Han Jisung | Han & Lee Felix are Best Friends, Hurt Felix, Lee Felix (Stray Kids) is Whipped, Lee Felix (Stray Kids) is a Sweetheart, Lee Felix (Stray Kids)-centric, Loona - Freeform, M/M, Minho Ships It, Minor Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Minor Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin, Minor Lee Felix/Yang Jeongin | I.N, Panic Attacks, Sad Ending, Sad with a Happy Ending, Shy Lee Felix (Stray Kids), Soft Lee Felix (Stray Kids), Soulmates, This Is Not Going To Go The Way You Think, Yang Jeongin | I.N is a Sweetheart, changbin thinks hes straight lmao, i made up go won and changbin dating
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2021-02-19 02:22:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 42,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22170340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluesunggod/pseuds/bluesunggod
Summary: A world where everything is colored with a black and white palate. That is, until you meet the one, the one who was made for just YOU.Felix is just a measly bookstore worker and in love with what he does, he never thought that one day he'd meet the person who was made for him. One day his world turns upside down and is filled with color, what could possibly go wrong?
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Lee Felix/Seo Changbin
Comments: 13
Kudos: 94





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gundhamronpa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gundhamronpa/gifts).



> I gifted this work to my soulmate ;)
> 
> enjoy this new story! i know i have like 2 others already open that sometimes i leave them dry for a minute but like i am really invested in this so please forgive me and my impulsive behavior to start a new fic sjsjjsjs
> 
> we wont talk about the fic in my drafts rn okay?

Everyday was the same, he’d open his eyes that he honestly didn’t know the color of and got ready for his day. He’d scan the room as it gave off several different shades of gray and black. His world was dull, though he didn’t mind. He was used to it, he’s known people have their color come back to them but in order to have such a thing to happen he’d have to meet his soulmate. In order to be able to see the vibrant colors people described in stories weren’t able to be seen. Some don’t even get to see the light colors, people die or people just don’t meet their soulmates.

Felix sat down at his regular table around his group of friends. They come to this cafe every Friday and sometimes Felix finds his mind slipping to the thoughts and imaginations of how it would look like in color. He found himself staring at all the paintings that hung up on the walls, his eyes scanning the shifts in shading. He wondered what colors they were and how they looked as they transitioned to another. He would have fell deep into thought if his big brother wasn’t pulling at his jacket.

“Felix, Jisung asked you a question.” Felix blinked before looking over at the male sitting across from him. He cleared his throat before nervously rubbing the back of his neck, “Sorry..lost in thought. What did you ask Sungie?” The other looked over upon hearing his name before tilting his head slightly, his eyes studying Felix’s face before speaking up. “Are you alright?” The question caught him off guard, his lips parting as he blinked in shock. “Yeah, I was just spacing out. You know me, just thinking about something.” Jisung hummed in response before asking another question. “Thinking about color again?”

Felix could feel his blood rush to his cheeks as he sighed softly, he was always very easy to read and he knew it. He was an open book, which was ironic since he worked at a bookstore. He slumped in his seat as he looked away, his eyebrows furrowing as he tried to look less upset then he was. He was sitting in a group of people who have already been matched up, well and his brother. His brother was like him but he wasn’t so hung up on the idea that he hasn’t met his soulmate. It would have been easier to not think about how he’s colorless if Jeongin was there that morning, he’s one of the few who just doesn’t have a soulmate. It’s a rare case but it does happen. Felix couldn’t imagine how he felt, knowing he’d live his life forever stuck in the monochrome colors. 

Chan sighed as he pulled his little brother into a tight hug, Felix trying his best to keep his composure but failing miserably. “I’m sorry I just..I..” He wiped the small tear streaks on his cheeks as he took a shaky breath, the group all moving to wrap their arms around the small boy. His light orange hair sticking up with all the static in between their clothes. Felix sniffled as he lifted his head from his brother’s chest, his eyes sparkling as they stared at Minho. Minho knew exactly where this was going and pulled the other towards the window by their table. The window sill jutting out acting like a seat for the two, the older of the two sitting on it before pulling Felix in between his legs. “I met Jisung at a train station.”

* * *

Minho stood in the cold waiting for his train, his nose buried into his coat as he tried to keep his face warm with the howling wind. His hair blowing in his eyes as he tried to peek past the brown strands to check the time every once in awhile. He hopped on his legs to try to warm up his shivering body, his ears a dark shade as the wind nipped at the tips. He knew he should have listened to Chan when he insisted on bringing a scarf but Minho just wanted to get going. His little brother Felix was suffocating and besides, Minho couldn’t help but miss his cats.

He sighed loudly as the station announced a delay, his body trying it’s best to fight the cold as he rocked on his heels. His mouth now removed from his coat as his breath made a smokey shade of gray in the air. He would have turned around and just have said fuck it if he didn’t notice the male next to the tracks, he wouldn’t have thought much about it but he looked out of it. His body swayed as his feet caught his body time after time again. His balance was horrid as his head leaned back with his eyes rolled back before he’d pulled his head back up and continue his swaying. His feet never stayed put for long, they were constantly going in a small square as he kept his body up somehow.

His small fingers fidgeting slightly as he seemed to be texting someone, his eyes stuck to the screen before sighing and shoving his phone into his pocket. He kept it up and Minho didn’t know what to do exactly, should he keep an eye on this guy or just give him the benefit of the doubt and assume someone would do it for him? He nibbled his chapped lip before deciding to stay, this guy looked young and who knew what people could do to him. He looked drunk and vulnerable. Minho sighed deeply but stayed put, his eyes glued to the other male from afar as he watched his every move. 

The other seemed rather stable for being drunk, his only problem being his unholy balance. His phone was out again at this point, his fingers tapping away as he seemed almost angrily texting someone. His footing was still fumbling around but other than that he seemed...okay? That is until his phone slipped right out from his hands, his face flashed in shock as his attention moved from focusing on keeping his body up to his phone. His feet stopped catching him and that’s when it happened, his body falling to the tracks.

Minho’s mind froze before he found himself running to the scene, his hand outstretched as his mind cluttered in desperation as he watched the other male shaking along the tracks. His ears picking up the train in the distance, Minho leaning closer as he screamed out for the other. “Grab on! Hurry..Fuck just grab on you idiot!” The other gulped before grasping Minho’s hand, and that was the moment. Minho’s eyes were met with a bright flash of light before his whole world was flipped. The amount of colors was blinding, it was so surreal. He stood there as their hands were clasped together, the other male’s body still on the tracks as they stared at each other dumbfounded. Minho yanked him up at the last possible second, the sound of his phone being crushed echoing in the silence of the two men. He had found his soulmate, and even  _ saved  _ his life.

His breath was caught in his throat as he gave out a measly croak, his eyes shaking as he tried his best to not just break down right then and there. The other seemed frozen in shock as his eyes darted over Minho’s face before closing slowly with a long exhale. One word escaping his lips as he gripped the sleeves of Minho’s coat. “Fuck.”

Minho had ended up taking the other to his apartment, they hadn’t said a word to each other since the incident but he didn’t really mind it that much. He wasn’t much of a talker himself, the train ride being silent as the younger had passed out against his shoulder. Minho couldn’t help it, his heart was racing still as he stared at everything he knew that was once only two colors. He stared at every forign shade that he was able to see so suddenly after living for 20 years without being able to even imagine his life having a speck of color. His mind wandered to the male’s situation. What had made him drink so much, and who he was texting so desperately? He wanted to ask so many questions but he stayed quiet as the train took them to his destination. 

The next morning Minho was in his kitchen, his hands wrapped around his coffee cup as the other stumbled into the room. He rubbed his forehead as his eyes scanned the area, utter shock painted on his face. Minho wasn’t sure if it was his apartment causing it or the fact that they could see color. “Hey..I’m sorry I brought you home but I couldn’t just leave you there. You...You’re my  _ soulmate. _ ” His voice was soft as he stared at the male who stood by his counter, his eyes straining as the light shined brightly through the open window. His hair was a mess as his dark  _ brown  _ strands stuck up in some places. Minho stared at him for what seemed like forever before he spoke up.

“Oh fuck, I’m Minho.”

* * *

“Do you think the world wanted you to meet Jisung at that exact moment?” Felix’s voice was soft, almost a whisper as he stared up at his friend with such admiration in his sweet brown eyes. Minho hummed as his hand ran through Felix’s hair, he was so used to knowing exactly what color of hair he had.and he got used to having him text him everyday asking if his outfit matched or not. He was so head over heels in love with Jisung ever since the day they met, he’s told Felix the story of them meeting almost a thousand times. He’d explain how it all played out and how he felt when his life changed. Jisung would always get embarrassed though even with Felix not being able to see the red hue to his cheeks he would always comment about how he could tell Jisung was embarrassed. His puffy cheeks would be a darker shade of gray, it wasn’t his normal hue.

Despite not being able to know what the other colors looked like Felix was very observant, he has trained himself to notice the little details about everything. Nothing could get past him easily, it’s his biggest coping mechanism. 

He sighed softly as he leaned his back against Minho’s chest, his eyes shutting as he tried to imagine how Minho felt when his sight was finally flashed with color. It must have felt utterly amazing. He felt the older’s chin resting on top of his head as he spoke softly to Jisung who now stood in front of the two. His ears picked up a quick kiss shared between the two before having Jisung’s shadow leave from hovering over Felix as his body had left the cafe. He opened his eyes after awhile, his brother meeting eye contact before looking away as he spoke to Hyunjin next to him. 

Hyunjin had his soulmate already as well, him and Seungmin had met in middle school and although they didn’t click right away they did end up together in the end. Soulmates were made for each other but that doesn’t mean that they’ll want to be together. Felix had mixed feelings on meeting his soulmate, what if they found him too nerdy or just not their type. He was energetic and a bit much to some people, Minho even told him on one of his birthdays that he used to hate his guts. It was a miracle they got so close to each other like they are now, Minho was like his second brother. Whenever he felt down he’d come down and just hang out with him when Chan couldn’t. He’d spent so many nights over at his house to the point Felix thought Jisung would hate him if he asked Minho to come over one more time.

He got up from his spot as he glanced at his watch, it was getting close to the time for him to leave and get to his job. Though he doubted anyone would come, it was such a cold day and no one would want to go outside, let alone a bookstore. He grabbed his coat and his wallet as he waved goodbye to his friends before turning to walk out, his hand grabbing his phone as he pulled out his earbuds. The white buds sliding into his ear as the soft music played covering up the echo of his feet hitting the concrete. His eyes focused on the gray tone of the sidewalk, what color was this? He couldn’t help but wonder, what colors were the small darker specks that were scattered along. His hand pushed open the door with a soft exhale as his body was finally met with the warmth of inside, his cheeks slowly going back to what he assumed was his normal skin tone.

Once he took his coat off and his earbuds out he stationed himself at the register, the girl who was working before him leaving as she chewed her gum as if she was trying to be obnoxious about it. He gave her a small wave before sitting down in his chair, his head was leaning along the top of it as he stared at the ceiling blankly. He lost track of time, no one was coming in so he had absolutely nothing to do unless he wanted to reread the books on the shelves again. He wished they added more books more often, he always zooms right through their new stock right before they make it to the shelves and to the public to purchase. He adores books, he adores the depiction of color in them as the writers who have soulmates write about the concept of  _ color.  _ He knew every color by name but if you asked him anything about them he wouldn’t be able to say anything else. 

His body leaned against the bookshelf as his fingers flipped through his favorite book. His eyes scanning the page with a small smile to his face, his favorite part coming up. The page marked as he folded the corner slightly so he could always find it even though he knew exactly what page it was. He was so invested into the book he didn’t hear the bell to the entrance ring until the person who came in was standing next to him.

“I’m so sorry to disturb you but do you work here..” Her voice was soft as Felix looked up a bit startled at the sudden appearance of someone. He put the book back on the self quickly as he cleared his throat and got up quickly. “Yes, sorry! What can I help you with?” She smiled before pushing her lightly toned gray hair behind her ear. “My boyfriend isn’t much of a reader but I wanted to take him to the book club that meets here tomorrow so I was wondering what book I could get him? He tends to like dark creepy stuff I guess.” She glanced around the place as her fingers played with the bow that was wrapped around her neck and tucked underneath her lacy top. 

Felix thought for a moment before walking to a section, his eyes glancing over the titles before pulling one out before turning to face the other. This book almost called to him, though he didn’t really know why. It was a good book sure, but not one of his favorites. It’s been collecting dust on the shelf for as long as he could remember, but for some odd reason it was beckoning him to pull it out again. “Good for people who don’t particularly enjoy reading. It’s a real page turner, I finished it in about two days.” He offered her the book, her fragile hands taking it as she flipped through some of the pages. “Thanks, this’ll work. How much are you asking for it?” Felix craned his neck as he glanced at the price tag on the back before answering with a sigh. “Twelve Fifty.” 

They walked to the cash register as Felix scanned the book, his hand taking her card as she handed it over. Go Won, that was the name printed onto the card. He couldn’t help but look at it as he swiped it through the machine, once it was done he placed it onto the book along with the receipt with a smile. “Have a nice day, hope to see you and your boyfriend tomorrow then.” He watched her smile widely before walking away, her dress flowing in the wind as a male who was probably her boyfriend wrapped his arm around her waist as he brought her close to his own body. Felix sighed as he watched it all go down, he wondered if the two were soulmates and if they could see the colors every book talked so much about. They acted like they could very well be made for each other, the way she looked at him with such a flashy smile and the way he looked back at her. Cold but soft enough to tell that he seemed to have feelings for her. It must have been nice to have such a feeling towards someone, it must be absolutely amazing to be able to see every color imaginable and be able to say things like; Blue looks good on you, definitely your color.

Felix let go another sigh as he pulled his phone out, his thumb scrolling through his conversation with Minho. His eyes scanning the texts the other would send back with a pang of jealousy. How on earth did Minho get so lucky that day he met Jisung? When was the world going to tell Felix it was his turn to meet his soulmate? The world was taking to long and at some point Felix may even give up on the idea of seeing color. He was terrified he’d find out his soulmate died before they could meet resulting in a mark appearing on his wrist. It was different for everyone, it usually was a symbol of a missed chance. For example if Felix was supposed to meet his soulmate in the rain by doing something cheesy like sharing his umbrella his mark could be an umbrella or a water droplet. 

Felix has always had mixed feelings on the whole soulmate concept but he does wish he could be able to experience life in a new lense. He so desperately wants to be able to see life to the fullest, of course he wants to meet the person who was made just for him as well. The colors just excited him a bit more, there was no fear in that part of the process. The colors don’t judge your and they can’t say you’re not their type either. They’re just there. Until your soulmate dies. His eyes moved from the text messages as he set his phone onto the counter, his arms crossed as he tried to get in a nap. He doubted anyone else would walk into the store, and he was right. Go Won was the only one. Looking for a book for her boyfriend. Perhaps soulmate even, to share her passion of books with him. Must be a feeling that she could never be able to put into words, no matter how many books she reads.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> that one chapter that makes our hearts go boom boom

> _"Changbin, can we promise each other one thing?"_
> 
> _-"Of course."_
> 
> _"Even if we aren't soulmates, we'll stay together."_
> 
> _-"Even if I meet my soulmate, I'm yours."_
> 
> **_-"Go won."_ **
> 
> * * *

Felix’s body was leaned against the couch, his knees pressed to his chest with a blanket wrapped around his shoulders. It was his only day off in the week so he spent it in front of the huge screen in his living room. The screen illuminating some colorless game as his fingers mashed against the buttons of the controller with his tongue gliding over his lips. His face screwed up in concentration as he got into a fight scene. His eyes narrowed as he leaned forward, he was so invested in the game that he had no idea his brother was watching him along with another male next to him. It was only when the screen went black and his reflection was staring back at him. His eyes studied the boys in the background before turning around with a face full of annoyance.

“What the hell Chan? You know this is my day off, can’t you guys hang out literally anywhere else?” He frowned as he moved to look at Changbin, Chan’s best friend as he held the tv remote in his hand with a neutral expression. “All you ever do is play games Lix, why don’t you go hang out with Jeongin or something.” Chan leaned over the couch as his hand ruffled through his brother’s hair causing Felix to sigh as he pulled the blanket around him tighter. “Yeah but I only get _one_ day off in the whole week so why can’t I just play games all day? I was in the middle of a boss fight and now I’m dead thanks to Changbin and his impatience. 

Changbin shrugged as he hand tossed the remote onto the couch before hopping over the top of it, his body now sitting on the cushions with a blank face. “Sucks.” He rolled his eyes before watching Felix get up with a huff. “You suck and so does your stupid friend. Worst brother ever.” His voice was soft as he grumbled under his breath, his body making his way to his room before plopping onto his bed. His fingers tapping away at his phone screen as he stared at his reflection in the glass. His eyebrows knotted together as they furrowed in annoyance and his lips formed a dark frown. 

**You:** _Hey Jeongin, wanna hang out before I have to do this thing at work? It was supposed to be my day off but stupid Chan decided to bring over Changbin and they kicked me off my tv. I have until like 3 to be free from my job before I have to go back & set up for this book club meeting tmr. _

**Jeonginnie:** _yeah sure. What do you want to do?_

 **You:** _I dunno, kinda bummed that I got kicked off my game :/_

 **Jeonginnie:** _just come over and play my games then._

Felix sighed as his finger turned off his screen as his head buried itself into his pillow. He moved his face to stare at his blank wall, the light gray tone staring back as he thought about what it really looked like. By the looks of it the color was most likely a light tone like white but maybe it was a whole different color like beige. Felix sighed as he shook the thought off, his body being pushed up by his arms as he got ready to head out to Jeongin’s. His eyes glancing at the tv to see what was so pressing that they felt the need to kick him off. His eyes rolling as he noticed they were just sitting watching Netflix, he never knew what was wrong with them hanging out at Changbin’s house. Surely, Changbin didn’t have a younger brother that would get in the way like Chan did. He didn’t say anything about though, he just grabbed Chan’s car keys as he leaned against the door.

“I’m stealing your car if you’re stealing my tv for the day that I remind you, I have off from work.” Chan looked up from the tv with a slight frown, his head propped up by his hand as he stared at Felix. “Come on Lix, don’t get mad. I promise I’ll let you have the tv next time. This is my house remember, I’m letting you stay here.” Felix played with the several charms Chan had on his keychain with a soft hum, it was true and that fact hovered over Felix in almost every argument they had. This was Chan’s house and he just had an extra room that he let Felix move into if he wanted to. Felix was young when Chan moved out of their parents so wherever he went Felix went too, when he offered to let Felix move in he agreed immediately. Even if he’s more grown since then he still lives under the same roof, mostly because there’s no way his salary from the bookstore is going to let him be able to live alone.

“Yeah okay whatever, I’m still stealing your car.” Chan shrugged as he rested his arm along the top of the couch, his body turning back towards the tv as he spoke. “You know the rules, scratch her up, you pay for it.” Felix nodded as he slipped out of the door with a mocking tone as he got into Chan’s car. “If you scratch her up, you pay for it.” His eyes fluttered back as his fingers turned keys, he was a good driver and he knew Chan knew that but it seemed that whenever Changbin was over he was always babied more than usual. Chan usually wouldn’t tell him the car ‘rule’ when he said he was going for a drive. He was only 3 years younger than Chan so maybe he was trying to make himself look more like some tough older brother figure when Changbin was watching?

He couldn’t say for sure, his mind cluttered with all sorts of thoughts as he pulled into Jeongin’s driveway. He turned the car off as he sat in the driver’s seat quietly. His head leaning back against the seat as his eyes closed, the dark blackness taking over his sight. His lips releasing a soft sigh as he exhaled slowly, how does Jeongin feel about his life? Knowing he’ll forever stuck in the monochrome phase without the moment of meeting a soulmate simply because he doesn’t have one. Does it make him jealous of everyone or does he feel relaxed knowing he won’t have to worry about waking up with a mark on his wrist telling him his other half has died. Felix fell deep into thought as he relaxed into the car seat, his eyebrows relaxing from his earlier furrowed expression with a frown. His eyes only fluttered open when a small knock was heard from his window. The small male waving at Felix with his small grin. “Come on in Felix.”

Felix got out of the car with a nervous smile, that must have been weird to see him just sit in his car as Jeongin probably waited for him to just come to the door. “You seemed deep in thought again. Jisung told me the whole soulmate and color thing had you thinking a lot yesterday. Still a little hung up about it? You can tell me, I don’t mind.” Felix puffed his cheeks up before blowing out the air in them with a big sigh. “I dunno, I was thinking of you actually, how you felt about the whole soulmate thing.” Jeongin’s eyes moved the ground before his shoulders shrugged as he lifted them back up. “It’s just life I guess, not everyone can be made for someone. There’s so many people there’s bound to be some who just don’t fit.” 

Felix hummed as he scuffed his feet along the driveway before the two walked into Jeongin’s room, their bodies laying against each other as they played some random game Jeongin had running for Felix before he came. Felix’s arms wrapped around Jeongin as he sat in between his legs with his back leaning against his chest. The two being overly used to being so cuddly with each other, sometimes it made him think how his soulmate would react to their relationship. He loved holding the younger close and sometimes he even imagined having Jeongin as his step in soulmate. Of course it seemed silly but at times he felt like he could fall for Jeongin. 

Felix’s fingers stopped pushing the buttons on the controller as his mind wandered again, as much as he wanted color in his life he couldn’t really think of a reason not to be able to fall for someone who wasn’t made for him. It wasn’t unheard of for people to reject their pairing because they fell in love with someone else. They’d meet and have the same color like all the rest of the pairs but it isn’t required to become a couple or try to after finding out. In fact, Hyunjin had met Seungmin before they even knew they were soulmates. It was when they _touched_ when Hyunjin pushed him over in the halls that they knew. Hyunjin was embarrassed of course, who goes out and practically bullies their soulmate? Of course he never knew but it was a big hurdle for them to get over. It almost seemed like a miracle that the two are a couple now.

Jeongin had noticed Felix slipping back into his thoughts, his finger pausing the game as he watched the gears turn in the others mind. His eyes studied every facial expression Felix gave off without even noticing that he had spaced out. He does this often, he tends to get lost in his thoughts from time to time. The topic of his soulmate gets him hung up for a few days then he’s back to normal afterwards. Felix blinked before turning his attention to the younger with an abrupt thought making its way into words. “I’ve never kissed anyone before.”

The thought almost made Jeongin laugh but Felix was dead serious as he furrowed his eyes. “Does that make me look inexperienced? Chan has been babying me recently, should I just go and kiss someone?” Jeongin quirked an eyebrow up before shaking his head with a chuckle. “You mean you’d kiss just anyone?” Felix opened his mouth to respond before closing it as he tilted his head, no he wouldn’t go around just kissing _anyone._ Though he didn’t really know how he’d go around asking people for kisses. Sure, Jisung and Minho kiss his cheeks every so often if he complains enough about them kissing each other. He’d be squished in between the two and instead of kissing each other they’d both kiss Felix’s cheeks. It was cute really and made Felix warm but that wasn’t a _real_ kiss. 

“Now that I think about it everyone babies me and not you and you’re younger than me.” Jeongin hummed as he leaned his head along Felix’s collarbone as he listened to him talk. “I’m only a year younger Lix. Besides, they only baby you because I’m more mature.” Felix pouted, proving what Jeongin had said almost instantly. “I’ll die alone and single without ever having my first kiss cuz my soulmate won’t want an inexperienced guy. Oh gosh should I be trying to date people-?” Jeongin lifted his head with a face full of confusion.

“What are you going on about? Getting rejected because you’ve never had your first kiss?” Felix nodded quickly causing a light chuckle to escape the younger’s lips. “If you’re so worried about it, I’ll kiss you.” Felix’s eyes went wide as his cheeks heated up in a matter of seconds, his hands going to cover them as he looked down for a moment. “I don’t need color to know that got you embarrassed, we don’t have to Lix. It was a thought, we’re best friends. Having your first kiss seems oddly important to you so let me assure it to you with someone you trust.” Felix’s adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed his nerves, this came out of nowhere but his thoughts of loving Jeongin pushed through everything coming back from the dead. “You’d do that..?” His voice was quiet as he tried to keep eye contact with Jeongin but it was an obvious struggle. 

Jeongin didn’t answer verbally, his body turned to face Felix as his hand ran through his soft hair. Before Felix knew it he was melting into Jeongin as their lips met. Felix’s eyes shut slowly, he didn’t know how to go about kissing back. He just knew deep down he _wanted_ to kiss back. Jeongin slowly pulled back, their lips brushing against each other before he leaned back to his original pose. Felix’s fingers gently ran along his lips as he blinked in shock. “Woah..” He smiled as his whole exterior shifted, his usual confident aura fading as his whole body screamed out with timidness. 

The younger chuckled in response, his hand patting Felix’s head before moving to connect his lips to his forehead. “There, now you have ‘had my first kiss’ on your dating resume.” Felix hummed as he let his thoughts take over a bit, his eyes moving to stare at Jeongin. Kissing him felt almost natural in a way, he felt foolish to have let his feelings for the younger bubble to the surface after he fought so hard to keep them down once before. “Jeongin can we..?” Jeongin glanced away from the tv that now played the game they were playing before. “Are you bored? We can go out somewhere if you want.” Felix shook his head as his fingers played with the fabric of his shirt nervously.

“Can we kiss again?” His voice was more confident as he cleared his throat, his eyes not wavering from Jeongin’s as the other stared back at him. “Sure.” He put his controller down onto his desk as he got up from Felix’s lap, his body standing in front of the elder as he tilted his head to get a better look at his expression. His lips curled into a small smile as he grabbed Felix’s face, his hands cupping his cheeks as their lips met again. Jeongin didn’t expect Felix to kiss back so suddenly, his hands gripping his shirt as the kiss slowly ended though neither of them pulled back. Instead, Felix just kissed him again, his hands pulling at his shirt as he tugged the smaller male over. Jeongin toppled over Felix, his body hovering over Felix’s with a dark tint to his cheeks. Felix pouted as the two’s lips separated, he didn’t know how to explain how much he felt like he _needed_ the small touches from Jeongin at that moment.

Jeongin ran his fingers through Felix’s hair before leaning back down as their lips slotted back together. Felix has never felt more comfortable than that moment. Jeongin’s kisses were so gentle as if Felix would shatter under him if he did it any other way. Felix’s body was almost completely relaxed until his ears picked up the sound of the door opening, his shoulders tensing as Jeongin hid his face in the crook of his neck. His cheeks burning as they rested along the skin of Felix’s neck. Felix could have sworn he felt his soul leave his body as Jeongin’s mother chuckled softly. “I’m sorry did I interrupt jeonginnie? I’ll come back when Felix leaves okay sweetie? Act like I was never here!” She giggled softly as she closed the door, Felix letting his breath go as he looked over at Jeongin. 

The younger was covering his cheeks as he stared down, his eyes refusing to meet Felix’s. He bit his thumbnail before finally looking up, shocked to see such a smiley Felix. “You know, it could have been worse huh?” He chuckled softly as his hand ran through Jeongin’s hair unconsciously. “Thanks though..you didn’t have to do any of that.” Jeongin sat up with a grin, his hands pulling up Felix as well before planting a quick kiss onto his cheek. “You’re right, but I wanted to.” He grabbed his controller as he left Felix stunned, his hand resting on his cheek as his other grabbed his own controller. The two played their game in silence until Felix’s phone gave off the dreaded alarm. His lips letting a deep groan out as he leaned against the other’s arm.

“I don’t want to go to work Jeonginnie..” The younger chuckled as he turned off his tv before patting Felix’s back. “It’s not really work today Lix, just setting up for work tomorrow. If you want, I’ll go with you to your book club thing. Then afterwards we can go get ice cream together, deal?” Felix nodded as he got off the bed with a hum. “Deal.” He left the room and awkwardly waved goodbye to Jeongin’s mother who was in the kitchen probably still gushing over the fact that her son was kissing someone despite not having his own soulmate. 

Felix sighed heavily as he started his drive to the bookstore, he loved his job don’t get him wrong or anything but it demanded so much of him. He was working so often that even his days off they managed to find a task for him to do. They did pay him nicely but it wasn’t good enough to live off of unfortunately. For now, he has to rely heavily on Chan as his brother to house and feed him. Though he does help with the bills and chips in with groceries obviously but it bothered him that he relied so much on his older brother. He parked the car in front of the store with a frown, he’d rather be stuck in between Minho and Jisung gushing over each other than at work right now.

His body made its way to the front door, his fingers wiggling the key into place as he unlocked the building. It only took him half an hour to set up the meeting space they always used for the book club. His arm wiping his forehead as he looked at the finished product, a table with signed copies of the book that they were talking about this time along with several chairs shaped in a circle for the members who all signed up. He was surprised at the number of the chairs he needed to set up this time, it was a rather larger group than before and though he was pleased more people were getting into reading it struck him as odd. Who or what was getting so many people into this space to talk about books?

He shrugged off the question knowing he probably come up with a good answer that would satisfy his curiosity. He left the room before locking up the store and checking his phone, several messages from Chan asking to bring home food along with a few form Jeongin. His eyes scanned the messages with a soft chuckle, his heart fluttering as if it was reminded of old feelings crawling right back up at a rapid pace.

**Jeonginnie:** _remember to pick me up tomorrow !!_

 **Jeonginnie:** _if you forget like last time i’ll SCREAM !_

 **Jeonginnie:** _also i hope us kissing didn’t ruin anything :(_

Felix licked his lips before driving home, his heart racing as he ran into the house. He dropped the food onto the table before throwing his hands into the air with a squeal. “I had my first kiss!!” Chan turned to face Felix with a raised eyebrow, the only sound coming from his direction was a snicker from Changbin from his spot on the couch. Felix’s heart sank as he gulped back his nervousness. “Why didn’t you tell me Changbin was still here?” His voice was soft as Chan made his way into the kitchen, his eyes peering into the bag Felix brought back. “Didn’t know he’d be staying but he’s staying over by the way.” Felix glanced over at Changbin as he now stood next to Chan with his normal neutral expression. 

“First kiss? Do you announce these types of things normally?” Felix scoffed at Changbin’s remarks, his cheeks growing hot as he tried to keep his cool. “It was a big accomplishment..” His voice went small as he looked down embarrassed he had even yelled it out, he was only expecting his brother to hear. Chan hummed as he pulled him into a hug as his hand ran through the younger’s hair. “So who’d ya kiss Lix?” He didn’t want to share anymore, his cheeks burned as he kept his gaze to the floor. “No one..” he mumbled as he took his share of food before retreating to his room. The last words he heard before shutting his door surprised him, changbin’s voice ringing through the air.

_“Your brother’s weird but like it’s kinda adorable.”_

* * *

Today was the day, he stood waiting for Jeongin to get ready as he leaned against his door. His mother still giddy over the two, the tight hug she gave to Felix when he showed up to pick up Jeongin could have broken so many bones if she wasn’t so in love with Felix. He was about to burst into the boys room and hurry him up when he finally walked out of his room with a frazzled look. 

“Mom do I match!?” Felix tried to keep his chuckles to himself as he’s seen Jeongin do this at least five times since he arrived. His mom raised her eyebrow as she studied his outfit before laughing at how nervous he looked. “Everything matches with those overalls sweetie, you look very handsome. Now go, Felix has been waiting on you forever.” 

The two made it to the book club and it still managed to surprise Felix how many people showed up and he was the one who set it all up. His eyes gazed across the room but halted when he noticed two people in particular. The girl from a few days ago and _Changbin._ Now why on _Earth_ would Changbin of all people be here? It struck him as more than odd to see such a person like him in his work but he shrugged it off, maybe Changbin liked reading. His fingers typed away as he shifted his weight, his ears listening to the distant chatter in the room.

  
**You:** _why is changbin at my work_

**Chan:** _idk_

 **You:** _I didn’t know changbin liked to read_

 **Chan:** _sometimes Felix, I ask myself if changbin even has the ability to read_

 **Chan:** _he doesn’t seem like the type does he?_

**Chan:** _anyways, enjoy work today baby bro!_

Jeongin nudged Felix as he tried to get the boy’s attention. “Come on Lix, do your job. I know it’s not the greatest right now but it gets you paid right?” Felix hummed as he slid his phone into his pocket as he read his brother’s last text. “My job is to supervise the event, make sure no one steals a book. I am doing my job as we speak.” He gazed around the room before stopping at Jeongin with a small smile. “Fun stuff huh?” His voice full of sarcasm as he rolled his eyes with utter boredom as Jeongin picked up the book on display. 

His eyes moved back to Go Won and Changbin, it was an odd pairing to see together. A girl who seemed to be in love with books and a guy like him. Though that’s when it clicked, Changbin was her _boyfriend,_ the one she had bought the book for. He hummed as he watched Changbin get up from his seat with a look of utter boredom as he made his way out of the room. Felix knew he wouldn’t have lasted long.

The meeting was long and drawn out, Jeongin ended up dozing off against Felix’s shoulder as they sat on a bench next to the book on display. Once it was over they managed to squeeze past the crowd but they didn’t expect such a huge crowd on the streets. It was the lunch rush hour and the streets were jammed with bodies just about everywhere, Felix taking in a sharp breath as his body was pushed around as he tried to walk to his car. His body hit someone rather hard but what flashed before his eyes terrified him. He turned to apologize but not only did he not know who’s body he truly hit but there was another factor that made his heart race a thousand miles per hour. His eyes recognized something new.

**_Color._ **


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the one where Felix pops off and whole ass dances and sings to Fancy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we put the romanized korean lyrics to fancy in here and we won't talk about it

Felix was dying. His throat tightened as his air flow practically stopped. He couldn’t breathe. He can’t breathe. He’s dying. He’s dying. _He’s dying._ His body slowly backed up along the store wall as his eyes darted to the crowd that could swallow him up at any moment. The colors were obnoxious, it was everywhere and too much to comprehend at once. His fight or flight kicked in hard, but he had nothing to fight. His hands went to grip his hair as he curled up, his body was boiling up in the adrenaline telling him that he needed to fight but he had no threat.

He couldn’t think well, there were way too many thoughts all asking for his attention at once. His hand shook as he tried to steady them by gripping his hair but they were too sweaty to really grab on. Felix was so sure he was dying but the soft voice of Jeongin proved him wrong, he _could_ breathe but not very well. He had to focus on it but he couldn’t bring his mind to focus on one thought in particular. 

“Felix hey..I know this is scary but what you’re feeling? You aren’t in danger. You’re safe with me.” Felix’s cheeks were drenched as he choked out sobs, his hands dropped from his hair as he tried to steady himself along the wall. His heart was beating rapidly, he tried to calm his breathing but it didn’t do much, his eyes moving to try to focus on Jeongin. Jeongin smiled as he gently rubbed Felix’s arms with hesitation. “Is this okay?” Felix nodded slowly before looking up noticing there was another body next to him, his breath hitching as he practically on it.

“Hey Felix, focus on me and my breathing okay?” He took small deep breaths as he knelt next to Felix. The younger slowly calmed his breathing as he stared at the rise and fall of his shoulders. “There you go, good good. You’re safe okay? Let’s get you inside.” Felix’s eyes gazed at Changbin’s features all in color now, his hair a dark black and his skin was on the paler side. His eyes were really pretty, like you could get lost in them easily. Go won got really lucky to have him as her soulmate. 

Changbin studied Felix’s expression, he seemed a lot calmer but definitely still panicking. He was trying to hide it, he wasn’t comfortable with Changbin, but he couldn’t just leave his best friend’s little brother mid panic attack. Chan would never let Changbin go if he did that. “Felix can I touch you? So we can move you from this crowded area.” Felix paused, his breathing stopped for a moment as it caught in his throat. He nodded slightly as his eyes moved to Jeongin as the younger smiled in reassurance. “Use your words Felix. Can I touch you?” Felix swallowed his nerves before softly speaking up, his words horse as he felt the panic rise all over again. “Y-yeah..” Changbin’s hands gently grabbed Felix’s before he slowly took him into the book store.

Felix let go a deep exhale, his shoulders dropping as he looked around at the familiar space he worked in everyday. His eyes scanning all the books as their colors shined in the sunlight. Changbin seemed to have noticed Felix’s change in attitude, his eyes scanning the books as well. Jeongin moved to stand next to Felix, their fingers slowly intertwining as the younger softly spoke to Felix with a smile. “Felix tell me again how you fix the broken books.”

Felix’s eyes sparkled as he turned to Jeongin with a large grin, his eyes shaping small moons as his hand grabbed a book. “I’ve told you like a thousand times. I’m gonna end up quizzing you this time so you can actually remember.” The two spoke quietly, Felix’s hands flipped along the pages as he explained every detail to Jeongin. Changbin watched the two interact but he would be lying if he told people he was actually paying attention to what Felix was even saying. He turned to look at the door when he heard the soft ring of the bell over the door, his girlfriend rushing to his side as she hugged his arm with a smile. “Oh there you are..you just left so suddenly. What happened?”

Changbin studied his girlfriend, noticing every little thing he wasn’t able to until now. Her nicely curled _blonde_ hair with her light _brown_ eyes. Her lips a glossy _pink_ color as they curled into a smile while she looked back at him. Changbin hummed before pointing at the two males hovering over a book. “Chan’s little brother was having some sort of panic attack so I felt like I should have helped, sorry I didn’t tell you I left.” They shared a kiss before Changbin moved to rub Felix’s shoulder gently. “I hope you’re more calmed down now, you know people are always here when you need it. Chan has my number if you ever need it or whatever.” Felix looked up from his book with a small smile as he watched Changbin leave with Go Won, the two of them smiling as their fingers intertwined. 

Felix closed the book with a hum before looking over at Jeongin, “Hold on, I'll be back.” He got up from his spot before running to Changbin, his arms tightly wrapping around his body as his head nuzzled into Changbin’s neck. Changbin let out a soft gasp before relaxing as he recognized Felix’s hair. He opened his mouth to ask if Felix was okay but the younger beat him to it. “Thank you Changbin..” He smiled nervously before waving shyly at Go Won before running back to Jeongin. “That was cute binnie, looks like you finally have made friends with Chan’s brother.” Go Won smiled as she watched Felix run away with a big grin on his face. “I guess so.”

* * *

Felix made his way back to Jeongin, their hands intertwined as they swung them in the air. Felix nibbled his lip before abruptly stopping in his tracks, Jeongin’s head turning to look behind him noticing the stop. “What’s wrong Lix?” His eyes looked around at his new world, so full of color and yet he doesn’t even know who caused it. “Jeongin I met my soulmate.” His words came out so abruptly as he dropped his hands to his sides. Jeongin’s eyes widened before running his hand along Felix’s back with a small smile. “Really? Who?”

Felix paused before furrowing his eyebrows, his mind straining to try to remember the moment it happened exactly but he just couldn’t. He remembered being pushed around and then just being hit with color like a truck. “I..I have no idea.” Jeongin tilted his head before rubbing Felix’s arms, he didn’t know what to say exactly. “Is that what caused you to panic, do you think?” Felix shrugged before pulling Jeongin into a tight hug with a shaky sigh. He didn’t answer but he didn’t need to, Jeongin’s hands ran along Felix’s back as they stood there silently. Jeongin broke the embrace slowly, his hands running along Felix’s cheeks as his eyes filled with tears.

“Lix it’s okay to cry..” His voice was soft, his eyes studying Felix’s face as he slowly broke down. His eyebrows furrowed as he quickly moved his hand to wipe his tears before Jeongin could. “It’s been such an overwhelming day. I don’t know how much more I can take innie..” Jeongin let out a deep exhale before pulling Felix close to him again, his head resting under his chin as Jeongin ran his fingers through the messy strands. “It’s okay Felix, crying won’t make you look weak. You’ve gone through so much today, let it all out babe..” Felix’s shoulders shook as he gripped Jeongin’s shirt as his tears soaked into the fabric, the hand brushing through his hair calming him down slowly. “I just want to go home.” Jeongin nodded as he gently pressed his lips to Felix’s temple. “Let’s go home then.”

The two walked next to each other quietly, the only thing breaking the silence was the ever so often sniffles from the red head. “Don’t utter a word to Chan.” He turned to grab his doorknob before entering his house only to meet his brother standing in the doorway. He gulped before looking over at Jeongin with a smile. “I’ll see you later..” He waved the younger away before closing the door behind him to face Chan.

“Where were you? Changbin called. What happened? Don’t try to lie to me Lix, tell me everything.” Felix sighed as he leaned against the door, his eyes scanning the room. He found the newfound colors so fascinating though he wished he could have gained them in a better circumstance. “I’ve had a really bad day Chan..can I just go to my room please?” His voice was soft as his eyes threatened another waterfall of tears. He couldn’t tell his big brother he didn’t know his soulmate, he’d go searching the whole world for the person and he’d never hear the end of it. “I’m fine, whatever Changbin told you was probably an over exaggerated version.” 

Chan scoffed before moving so Felix could go to his room. “Next time you have a panic attack have someone call me okay? I’m glad to hear Changbin was there to help you but still, what if he hadn't been there?” Felix walked to his room without a word spoken, of course Changbin would tell Chan about what happened. His body plopped onto his bed, his hands gripping his blankets as he screamed into his pillow. His head lifting as he looked back to Chan standing in his door frame with a worried expression. “Felix, can we talk about why your day has been so shitty?” Felix sighed heavily before sitting up on his bed to leave room for his brother. “Fine, okay whatever.” Chan shook his head as his arms tightly over his chest. “If you don’t want to right now we don’t have to.” He paused for a moment before ruffling his brothers hair with a smile. “I’m just worried about you kiddo.” 

He got up from the bed before looking back at Felix as he walked out. “Oh by the way Lix.” His head poked from the door with a goofy grin spread upon his lips. “The tvs yours for the whole week, Changbin said he’s chill with hanging at his place.” Felix hummed in response before shooing his brother away. “Okay cool, now go away.” He pushed Chan away before closing the door in his face. “Damn you Changbin..”

* * *

The week dragged by painfully slow, keeping his soulmate a secret was more strenuous than he thought it would be. His eyes would gloss over as he happily gazed at the usual black and white walls of the cafe, now painted with such vividly bright colors. He always spaced out like before but for a whole set of different reasons, no one seemed to notice at first but of course Jisung got curious.

“Earth to Felix. Hello..? Are you in there?” Jisung’s knuckles lightly jabbed Felix’s temples, his eyes blinking as he moved to look at the other with an annoyed expression. “What?” He looked around the table before sinking into his chair with a soft exhale. “Sorry, what were we saying?” Minho rolled his eyes before patting Felix’s thigh with a soft chuckle. “What’s on your mind Lix?” Felix hummed as he played with the straw wrapper that was long abandoned on the table. “I can’t really pinpoint one thing.” His voice was soft as his deep tone broke the painful silence. Jisung rose an eyebrow before pulling the younger into his lap, his lips pecking Felix’s cheek before resting his head onto his shoulder. “Let’s see..Our little Felix has been staring at his favorite painting. Though, I have noticed he has been doing it twice as much. Is the colorless stuff really getting to you again?” 

Felix nibbled his lip before turning to face Jisung. “The exact opposite actually, the color bothers me.” His voice silenced the whole group, Chan’s head lifting from his arms quickly with a shocked look. Minho practically ripped Felix off of Jisung to pull him in a suffocating hug, “Felix baby! That’s amazing, you met them!? How were they? He or she? I remember you said you were really confused, are they hot to balance out your super cute side? Are they…?” Minho’s voice dropped as he noticed his boyfriend’s worried expression, his head tilting to look at Felix’s expression. Tears slipped from his doe eyes, his lip trembling as he stared down at his fingers.

“I--. I don’t know Minho, I really..wish I knew.” He moved to sit in his own chair as he wiped his cheeks before smiling shyly. “Sorry, this week has kinda been straight from hell.” Chan poked his nose before flashing his teeth at his brother. “Hey, how about I call you out of work and we all go to our place and have a big sleepover. All of us, how does that sound?” Felix nodded as he looked around the table before quickly wiping his cheeks dry as he sighed quickly. “No PDA rule. Minho. Jisung, that’s aimed at you two.” His eyes rolling as the two groaned as they pulled away from their kiss. “One day Felix, we’re gonna be the ones to tell you to stop making out with _your_ soulmate.” Jisung teased before getting up to pay, his lips pecking Minho’s lips quickly as if it were the last kiss they’d have for the day. 

They all ended up sprawled along the couch with blankets running along their bodies as they cuddled together under them. Felix’s head lodged under Jeongin’s chin as his body was laid on top of just about everyone. The whole group was used to babying him even when he wasn’t having some emotional breakdown, it was just a routine they fell into. Chan was their group mom and Felix was the baby if you ignored their ages. Jeongin’s hand absentmindedly brushed Felix’s hair behind his ear, his fingers playing with the strands of orange as he stared at the TV screen. His eyes moving to Felix, he was way more interesting than some show that he’s seen over and over.

He’s accepted that he’ll never be able to experience the color Felix is having now but he wished he could just once see the freckled boy in color. Just once. Felix must have noticed there were eyes on him, his head moving to look up causing his hair to fall over Jeongin’s hand. Their eyes met for a moment before Felix propped his body up, their lips gently brushing along each other, Jeongin’s hand lifting his chin as his thumb rubbed his bottom lip. Jisung shifted his position, his eyes just barely catching the two in the corner with a soft gasp. “The hypocrisy!” Minho leaned his head back to look before pushing his boyfriend’s face away with a sigh. “You’re so annoying babe, let him be.” Chan chuckled softly as he ruffled Jisung’s hair with a finger to his lips. “Was your celebrated first kiss with Jeongin Lixie?” Felix groaned as he pulled the blanket over their heads with a dark blush spreading to the tips of his ears.

Jeongin’s hands moved to cup his cheeks before laughing softly. “Embarrassed?” Felix shook his head as he spoke softly, his fingers gripping the blanket over his head as his lips curled into a smirk. “No, I just don’t want Jisung to see me breaking my own rule.” Jeongin scoffed before pulling Felix’s face to his with a smile. “Or you don’t want Chan to make fun of you.” Felix pecked at the younger’s lips before speaking, their lips brushing against each other as he spoke. “Maybe, but it doesn’t matter the reason. I kinda liked when we kissed last time..” Jeongin didn’t reply, their lips pressed together gently. They didn’t even notice the blanket being moved from over them as Jisung peeked over the edge of the couch. “Damn..who knew they’d end up making out like-- right next to Chan. Felix is _asking_ to be murdered.” Felix pulled away abruptly, his eyes glaring holes through Jisung as he tossed a pillow at him with a frown. “Jisung I hate you!” His body leaving the couch as the two ran around the room with fits of laughter.

Chan chuckled as he watched his brother throw just about every pillow at Jisung, his eyes glancing over to Jeongin before patting his leg. “I’m not killing either of you, it’s not my business who Felix is kissing. He’s an adult and besides, I trust you Jeongin.” He smiled at the other before looking down at his phone with a sigh. “I’ll be right back guys!”

Chan got off the couch as he watched as Felix had Jisung pinned to the ground, his hands shoving a pillow onto Jisung's face as the two laughed softly. Chan chuckled at the sight, his hand moving to his ear as his thumb tapped the screen. “Hey Changbin what’s up?” He began to walk to his room but his body stopped for a moment, Changbin on the other end sounded frantic as he spoke. “Hey hey Changbin slow down, what happened?” He moved his phone to his other ear as he pushed open his door with his free hand.

“Chan I can’t think straight, I met my soulmate a few days ago. Well, saying I met them is stretching it. All I know is that I can see color and I have no idea how to tell Go won. We _promised_ we’d stay together no matter what. I don’t know if I should even tell her or-” Chan sighed as he sat on his window sill, his head leaning against the glass as he waited for Changbin to finish but he never did. So he interrupted him. “Changbin. If you want to tell her do it, she won’t hate you. This is your girlfriend we’re talking about. Where did you quote unquote meet your soulmate? Maybe you two can meet up and sort it out. It’s not uncommon that the two don’t end up with each other you know.”

There was a pause from the other end before Changbin spoke softly into his phone. “I dunno, before I helped Felix with his panic attack. I remember seeing color then.” Chan nodded as he picked at the frayed strings on his jeans before stopping abruptly. “When Felix had his panic attack?” He got up from his spot, his phone shutting off as he hung up on the other before he could even respond. It was too convenient, both of them meeting their soulmate that day but not actually meeting the other. Changbin was Felix’s soulmate. He had to be, no doubt. He was excited to know his brother’s soulmate but he had no idea how to bring it to his brother lightly. His soulmate has sworn himself off to another and even though Felix seems to be content with Jeongin at the moment he knew it wouldn’t last. 

Chan left his room nervous as he glanced over at his brother, the freckled boy had moved so his head was resting on Jeongin’s legs as his body laid on Jisung and Minho. The boys all fast asleep now, Minho’s head leaning back as he softly snored with Jisung cuddled up to him. Chan ran his fingers through his brother’s hair before sitting onto the arm of the sofa before letting a soft sigh escape his lips. “My best friend is my brother’s soulmate..and on top of that? Changbin has a girlfriend.” Chan frowned as he thought about it, he knew Changbin had made a promise to Go won about never leaving her no matter what. Even if he had met his soulmate, there was no way they were going to separate. Felix wasn’t ready to be rejected by such a big person in his life. He’s never even been in a relationship, hell his first kiss was yesterday with Jeongin. “Fuck you world.” How could the world be so cruel to pair those two up? It simply wasn’t fair.

Felix’s body shifted and with one small roll it was planted on the ground, his face buried into the carpet. A small groan slipped from his mouth as he slowly pushed his body up, his eyes moving up to meet the gaze of his brother as he snickered from his spot in the kitchen. “Here Felix, I made pancakes.” His eyes smiled as he stared at the other on the floor, his face skeptical. “What’s the occasion..? You never make pancakes unless you’re worried that I’ll have a bad day.” 

Chan shook his head as he patted the seat next to him as he picked up a fork for himself. “You’re actually going to have the best day of your life today. I’m making these just to make sure you have a great start to it. So eat up kiddo.” Felix shrugged his doubts off as he grabbed a plate and some pancakes. “I have work at noon.” He stuffed his cheeks with the fluffy pancakes as he looked over at his brother who still seemed to be smiling ear to ear. “No you don’t. I called you in so you could maybe hang out with Changbin and I today?” Felix’s eyes narrowed as he slowly chewed his food, why would he want to hang out with him and Changbin? Why would his own brother call him out of work to do something so stupid that he did very rarely. 

“I’ll pass.” Felix looked down at his plate before glancing over at his brother whose smiled faded. “What? Why do you want me to hang out with you and Changbin? You guys always kick me off of what I’m doing when he comes over. What’s changed?” Chan sighed before pulling Felix into a hug, “Is it such a crime to want to see my brother more often?” Felix hummed as he looked over at the males on the couch, Minho and Jisung softly talking together with small grins. “Okay I’ll hang out with you guys I guess, does Changbin know I’m tagging along?” Chan nodded before stuffing his cheeks with the rest of the pancakes on his plate before getting up, his hand patting Feix’s back before he washed his dishes. He put a finger up before speaking again with a smile. “Be ready in an hour. Hey boys! Outta my house now.” Jeongin’s head lifted slowly before smiling at Felix when they met eye contact.

Felix smiled shyly before looking away, his cheeks dusting a light pink as he ate his pancakes silently. Minho dragged Jisung out the door as the other whined about how tired he was, Jeongin walking out behind them and closing the door. Felix sat at his place, the house was silent as he finished his breakfast. It felt weird, he was so used to Chan hanging out with Changbin while he ate alone in the mornings though Chan made certain he ate with him even for a bit this morning. He washed his dishes before walking into his room, his hands opening his closet. What should he even wear? What would they be doing? His eyes scanned the colors of his clothes before taking a soft pink sweater and jeans. His hands grabbed the bottom of his shirt pulling it over his head. He stared into the mirror, his irises scanning the color of his skin and hair. His mouth parted slightly, he could never get used to the fact that he could see it all now. It never ceased to amaze him every time he got the chance to look.

He got dressed before walking out of his room with a long yawn, his arms stretching over his head as Chan looked up from his phone while he sat on the counter waiting. “Ready to go Lix?” Felix nodded in response as he wiped his eyes with his sweater sleeves. “Yeah..just wish I got more sleep you know?” He sniffed as he walked to his brother, his head instantly resting onto his shoulder with a soft whine. “What are we gonna do?” Chan hummed as his hand instinctively began to brush through the orange fluff as he spoke. “Changbin wanted to get some coffee then we decided we’d let you choose what we do, since it’s your day off. How does that sound kiddo?” Felix nodded as he grabbed his coat before walking out of the house with a look of exhaustion. Changbin stood by his car in the driveway, his hands in his pockets as he tilted his head to get a better look at Felix’s expression.

“Didn’t get much sleep there, Felix?” Felix rolled his eyes before getting into the back seat of Changbin’s car. “I need coffee with..-” Changbin cut him off as he leaned into the car as he smirked looking at the sleepy male. “With extra whipped cream and espresso shots to get you through the day of annoying customers at work.” Felix blinked in shock as Changbin closed the door before him and Chan got into the front seat, the two talking about something irrelevant. Once they got to the small cafe Felix immediately went to the counter to order with a grin, his hands moving to his pocket before his smile fell. He had forgotten his wallet, he was so out of it he must have spaced out. He sighed as he looked back for Chan only to have Changbin reach past him and placed his card onto the counter, adding his order on top of Felix’s. “Those two are both on my bill.” Felix puffed his cheeks out but only got a soft chuckle in response. “Don’t stress it Felix. I got you.”

The three sat at a table next to the window once their order came out, Felix resting his head in his palm as he looked out the window. “Felix.” Felix looked over with his eyes opened wide, Changbin’s voice sounded like he had been saying his name for at least two minutes trying to get his attention. “Huh yeah?” He smiled nervously before slowly drinking his coffee to hide his embarrassment. “Have any ideas of what we’re going to be doing today? You’re the planner.” Felix almost spat out his coffee as he tried to contain his shock. “Oh yeah right- uh..” His eyes scanned out the window trying to find something of interest but the world was against him. “Nothing comes to mind, so maybe we can just walk around a bit?” Chan shrugged as he sipped his coffee, “Sounds fine to me kiddo.”

The three left the cafe and began to walk around the town, Felix’s coffee was kicking in as he walked with a hop to it. His face lit up with a smile as he looked around for things to do, and then it hit him. His hand went to grab Chan’s shirt as he tugged his arm. “Guys guys guys! Can we go to karaoke?! Pleaseee? I haven’t gone in ages!” His eyes sparkled with a huge smile plastered to his face. Changbin tilted his head back with a low grumble before looking over at Chan. “I hate karaoke. It’s embarrassing.” Felix hopped on his heels as he hummed happily, completely oblivious to Changbin’s complaint.

“He looks so excited binnie, let’s just humor him okay? Just look at him..” Changbin glanced over at the younger, the boy was gleaming as he rocked on his heels excitedly. How could he say no to such an eager face? He didn’t know if it was the coffee already kicking in or if Felix was _generally_ super excited to go to karaoke. Either way, there was no humane way he could say no to such a cute face. “Fine okay, let’s go.” Felix gasped before clapping his hands together. “Yay! Let’s go!” He grabbed each of the other’s arms as he dragged them along. “I can’t wait to sing Fancy~!” Changbin sighed as he tried to keep with Felix and his high energy. “Fancy..like..” Felix looked back with a grin before skipping to the front desk. “A room for one session please~” He hummed as the girl rung up the price but his heart sunk once he noticed who she was.

Go won smiled as she waved at the group, her eyes lingering on Changbin before looking at Felix. “I finished the book yesterday by the way, I loved it. Could you recommend me another next time I come?” Felix nodded though his hyper energy seemed to be drained from him completely. Changbin leaned over the counter with a smile as his lips pecked Go won’s, “Think we can get in for free? I’ll take you out to that fancy restaurant you like for dinner tonight.” Felix almost gagged as he looked away from the lovey dovey couple, he looked around the place as he half listened to the conversation. “Only this once, room 12 babe.” Her voice was soft as she handed a key to Chan with a smile. “Have fun!” Felix nodded though he would be lying if he said she didn’t ruin the whole mood for him.

They walked into the room though instead of getting overly excited Felix just sulked in the corner for a bit. How come everyone got to be so cutesy with their soulmate when he didn’t even know who his was? He crossed his arms as Chan looked through the songs with Changbin with soft whispers. Chan looked over at Felix with a slight frown before selecting his song, though he had no intention of singing it himself. Felix’s head shot up as he heard the familiar opening to his favorite song, his body urging him to go up to the microphone and sing his heart out but he only mumbled the words to himself in the corner. 

Chan sighed heavily as he grabbed a microphone and brang it to his lips, “Oh tell me I’m the only one babe. I fancy you, I fancy you fancy you.” He nudged Changbin which only earned an eye roll but he played along grabbing microphone. “Twice!” His face scrunched up as he yelled out the single phrase, he hated this already but if it meant Felix would get out of his random spur of unhappiness he’d do it. Felix tried to hide his smile as he looked down at his feet but didn’t get up and sing, so the two kept going. Chan singing with a smile as he sang his heart out, his fingers pointing to Changbin as he cued the other male. Changbin sighed before putting the microphone up to his lips, his face dull as he softly sang along to the machine. “Dalkomhan chocolate ice-cream-cheoreom. Nogabeorineun jigeum nae gibun so lovely~” His voice was sweet though his face made it obvious he wasn’t particularly enjoying it. Felix watched as Changbin glared at the screen with a soft giggle, why was he doing this for? Chan was perfectly fine with doing this on his own.

Felix couldn’t help it, he had to get up and sing along. He felt bad that he was putting Changbin in so much torture. His body had a mind of its own, he hopped up from his seat and danced along with the choreography as his voice rang through the room. His smile lit up the room as he danced around and sang the chorus. “Fancy! Ooh!” He kept going not even noticing that Chan and Changbin had sat down and started talking to each other quietly. It wasn’t until the end of the song that he noticed he was up there alone, his cheeks turned a dark red as he pushed up his sweater sleeves with small droplets of sweat on his forehead. “Feel better Lix?” Chan smiled as he got up scrolling through the songs as Felix sat down next to Changbin.

“You dance really well, you could join Minho’s dance team thing.” Felix shook his head quickly as he pushed his hair back out of his face with a soft nervous laugh. “No way, I only do covers. No way I could make my own stuff.” He got up from the bench as he looked over at the other two. “I’m getting a drink want anything?” Changbin raised an eyebrow before grabbing a few dollars from his wallet. “Get us all a water, and maybe bring your wallet next time.” His voice was teasing as Felix took the money with a pout. “I’ll pay you back..” He walked out of the room as he walked to the vending machine with a hum. “Geogi neo I fancy you..amuna wonhaji anha. Hey, I need you~” His voice was soft as he picked up the water bottles with a bubbly smile. Once he walked in he was amazed, Changbin was holding a microphone to his lips as he sang softly to a song Felix recognized. G-Dragon’s Untitled.

His heart fluttered as he pressed the bottle caps to his lips as he contained a huge grin, Changbin’s singing voice was really pretty. Felix leaned against the door with a smile, Chan studied him before chuckling softly. Felix looked like a fourteen year old girl head over heels in love with someone. Though, maybe it was just the vibe soulmates got from each other? Once Changbin finished Felix clapped with a toothy grin. “Wooah! Your voice is so pretty! Why were you so against going here?” His eyes were huge and full of curiosity though Changbin seemed on edge. “Oh..I just hate singing. I’m not that great at it, you’re just being nice.” Felix pouted but dropped the topic as he scrolled through the music with a hum.

Chan watched as Felix seemed content, as long as he was happy he didn’t mind not being able to sing much. Felix squealed softly and that could only mean one thing, Changbin knew what was coming though Chan made sure he stayed put. Once they heard the music start up Changbin swore he felt his soul leave his body. It was another Twice song. Felix turned to them with a dramatic look before pointing at Changbin with a grin. “You and me in the moonlight~” Changbin slumped in his chair as he accepted his fate with a soft groan. He grabbed a microphone after a bit as he sang softly along with Felix. “Let’s dance the night away..”

The two sang the song, well most of it was Felix though Changbin pitched in once in awhile as Chan snickered as he watched Changbin’s misery mixed with how happy Felix was. Once their time was up in the booth Go won knocked on the door with a smile. “Did I heard Changbin singing _Twice_?” She smiled as she tried to hold in a laugh in, “Oh my god that’s precious. I wish I could have recorded it.” Changbin grunted before walking past her after planting a quick kiss on her cheek. “Yeah yeah, see you tonight.”

The three walked out as Felix happily hummed the songs they sang, Chan only stopping when he spotted a photo booth. “Yo guys, let’s take a photo!” Felix’s eyes sparkled before he ran to the booth with a smile, “Oh can we!?” He gave the two the biggest puppy eyes as he practically begged for them to give in. Changbin sighed before sliding into the booth, his eyes glancing over at the brothers. “Well come on then.” Felix got in first then Chan followed, his finger tapping the settings then start. His arm wrapped around Felix as his teeth flashed a smile. The first photo was taken then Chan hummed before scooting out of the booth quickly. “Oh hold on! Keep going!” He got out of the view though Felix looked at the camera once it started it’s countdown, his smile coming out as nervous though by the next few photos him and Changbin were smiling wide with peace signs put up. 

Felix scooted out of the booth to look at the photos with a small smile. “Woah, they ended up super cute!” Chan looked over his shoulder with a point as he rested his head on Felix’s shoulder. “Dang, looks like I missed them.” Felix nodded before looking at his brother with a frown. “Why did you leave in the first place?” Chan held up a bag with a small laugh before ruffling Felix’s hair. “I got my little bro snacks. I’m the best brother, I know I know.” Felix shrugged before handing Changbin his copy with a smile. “See ya Changbin!” The two brothers walked off talking and laughing as Changbin stood there staring at the photos. 

Changbin shook his head with a smile, the photos did turn out cute just like Felix had said. His eyes closed before releasing a deep sigh, what about Felix makes him feel differently? How could someone just flip his whole world upside down just by being there? It made no sense, was it just because of Felix’s hyper attitude clashing against his? He shrugged it off as he drove home and walked to his room, his fingers pressing the photos they took to his bulletin board. He backed away to look at the photos scattered on the board with a smile, “Cute.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the one where jeonglix says gay lives matter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy valentines day !! your prize is BOTH my fics are updated ! enjoy !!

The alarm rang through Felix’s room, the loud beeps echoing from his walls as he slowly lifted his head. The sound ran through his ears before his hand slammed his phone down with a groan. He sat up with a frown, his arms going above his head as he stretched. His lips blowing air out with a deep sigh before he got dressed into his uniform for work. He dragged his feet out of his room with a loud sigh, his eyes glued to his brother as he sat at the kitchen table with a coffee. “No Felix, I’m not calling you out again. Go to work. You’ll survive.” 

Felix whined as he grabbed his keys with a pout before walking out the door, he can’t avoid working and running into Go won forever. He walked into the book store with a nervous feeling, what would his boss say? What has Chan been saying to get him out of work two days in a row? He gulped as he moved to the employee room as he set down his things. It only took a few seconds for his boss to be by his side, though surprisingly she didn’t look mad. She looked worried. “Oh Felix you’re back! How are you feeling? Your brother said you had a nasty cold. Glad to see you’re back in action kid. Let me know if you aren’t feeling well and I’ll send you home on a paid leave. You do so much for this place, I can tell you have such a strong love for books.” Felix was shocked, she ate up everything Chan had told her didn’t she? He shrugged it off as he went to do his usual routine. 

His finger’s ran along the book’s spines with a smile, his face lit up with fascination as he studied all the different shades of colors. He couldn’t help it, his hands pulled out the books on each shelf and flipped through the pages. His eyes scanned the pictures with crinkles to the side as he smiled widely. He only looked up when he heard Go won’s voice saying his name, “Felix.” He closed the book as he smiled nervously, he was slacking off and left a customer waiting. Granted he knew the customer but it wouldn’t have looked good if people didn’t know that. He put the books back as he straightened up before clearing his throat. “How can I help you?”

Go won smiled as she clutched the book she bought from Felix awhile ago, her blond hair fell past her shoulders as it curled perfectly. Her bangs pulled back with a black bow, her outfit was stunning. A light blue suit like look, her jacket and skirt a matching blue plaid along with a white button up under the jacket. “I loved this book and was wondering if you had anything from the same author? Or anything like it? The way she wrote..it was beautiful.” Felix nodded as he took her wrist and lightly dragged her around the bookstore. “These ones would be good or..” He stacked the books in her arms before turning around with a huge grin, her eyes barely peeking over the books as she held them carefully. “Oh sorry, let me help you with some.” He took a few, their eyes meeting for a moment before Felix turned away with a smile.

“This is a lot of material and I’m sure it’s not cheap to buy them all so if you want you can read some over and decide which ones you like enough to keep. I read the books we have a lot, the corner by the window is my favorite spot..I even put a pillow there.” Go won smiled as she took some of the books to the spot and sat in the window sill, her back resting against the pillow Felix had put there to lean against himself. He watched her for a moment before going back to his station at the cash register. Go won eventually bought a few books and waved goodbye, after that no one really came. It was a killer slow shift but when it was over Felix hopped over the counter and ran out with a grin. His hands were thrown in the air as he took a deep breath in. “I’m free!”

“Felix, please take your things from the break room before you lock up.” Felix smiled nervously before walking back into the store, his hands grabbing his water bottle and keys as he walked out of the store. He locked up then rushed home, he was going to retreat to his room but his brother had other plans. “Lixie, kiddo come here.” Felix’s shoulders dropped with a deep sigh, he turned to face his brother with a tired look. Chan smiled as he pulled Felix into a hug, his hand ruffling his hair as he pulled away. “We’ve planned some small scavenger hunt for our little baby, Minho wanted to make it up to you for making you cry over your soulmate.” Felix’s jaw dropped before he shook his head with a small laugh. “Alright whatever. Sure.”

Chan smiled brightly as he handed Felix a piece of paper before running out of the house. Felix was shocked to say the least but he looked down at the paper with a hum. “Open me up when you want to use me and close me when you’re through. Search for me in your room to find the next clue.” Felix’s eyebrow quirked up as he thought over the rhyme, there could be so many answers to that riddle how on earth was he supposed to figure it out? Why give him such a hard one to start off with? His fingers flipped the paper around to see if there was any clue other than that. Felix sighed before moving to his room, his eyes scanning the room to try to see any other pieces of paper around. “What the hell Chan..”

He rummaged around his room, opening drawers and his closet as he tried to figure out where the next clue could have been. He basically tore apart his room looking for anything but eventually he sat on his bed frustrated. He sighed as he looked around, his eyes catching a faint glow coming from his laptop. Did he forget to turn it off when he last used it? He opened it up, his mouth turning into a frown as he noticed a sticky note stuck to his screen. “ _ That  _ was the answer!? A laptop? Oh fuck you Chan.” He took the note off as he read it, his eyes moving to the page that was left open with a hum. “An address?” He typed it into his phone, his head tilting as it popped up. It was just a park, what did this have anything to do with anything? What was Chan planning with Minho?

He sighed as he shoved the note into his pocket, he was still in his uniform and he scolded himself for not changing when he was tearing apart his room earlier. He made it to the park with a soft sigh, he had no idea what to do next. He was about to turn back until Changbin stopped him with a small smile. “Hey Felix, I have your clue or whatever.” Felix’s jaw dropped, Changbin was in on this too? He sighed as he offered his hand for the clue but Changbin just shook his head. “I am tall and strong, I stay outside. I give birds homes and help you breath, I even give you fruit to eat. Find me.” He rubbed his neck with a small apologetic look before waving Felix off. “That’s all I was given, good luck!” He then turned and walked off leaving Felix to think over what he heard. “It’s a tree, but which one. What the hell?!” He rubbed his face with a deep growl before looking around the park, he would have given up if it weren’t for someone calling his name. Though he had no idea where it was coming from.

“Lixie! Look up!” Felix rolled his eyes as he took a deep breath trying to calm himself down from his annoyance. He glanced up shocked to see Jisung waving at him from a tree branch. “Come climb up for your next clue!” Felix shook his head as he stood at the base of the tree with his arms crossed over his chest. “I’d rather die, can’t you just tell me from up there?” Jisung shook his head with a grin as he gave Felix a heart from his fingers. “Come come!” The younger groaned but started to climb up anyways, he might as well just go through with it if the whole group had worked so hard on it. He sat on a branch next to Jisung praying that the branch wouldn’t break with their weight both on it.

“Okay I don’t actually have a clue I just was told to tell you to go to the cafe.” Felix gripped the branch as he glared at the male next to him. “I had to climb this tree for  _ that _ !? Jisung I want to strangle you.” Jisung pouted as he nuzzled his head into Felix’s neck with a whine. “But Lixie..I climbed this tree and waited just for you. Come on babe, kisses!” Felix sighed, his lips pecking Jisung’s cheek before starting to climb down with soft grumbles. “I love you Felix!” Jisung hummed as he waved watching Felix walked towards the cafe. “Yeah yeah love you too.” His words coming out in a huff as he shoved his hands into his pockets, his face scrunched up as he tried to contain his annoyance.

Once he walked into the cafe his face softened, the smell of the cafe welcoming him with open arms. He looked around for some sort of clue though he didn’t know where to look. He must’ve looked like a lost puppy since a barista walked up to him with a small grin. “Are you Felix?” When he nodded she left and came back with a coffee, her lips spread into a smile as she handed it to him. “Enjoy.” He thanked her as he sat down by the window with a curious look, this wasn’t the prize was it? It seemed so simple, a coffee after a long shift? He took a sip as he thought about it, his lips curling into a smile as he enjoyed the taste. His eyes moved to the label, his name neatly printed along with a small note under it. His head tilted to get a better look at it. It was another address though he knew this one by heart. It was the bookstores address, but why were they sending him back there? He locked it up anyways, what was going to be waiting for him there? He sighed softly as he cupped the coffee as he sat in the cafe for a moment.

He eventually dragged his body up from the chair and made his way back to the bookstore. He walked up to the store only half surprised to see Minho waiting for him with a huge grin plastered to his face. “Hey Lix, how are you feeling?” Felix glared at such a question which only made the elder chuckle as he patted his back. “Okay ready for my clue?” Felix nodded, he had no choice really. He accepted his fate once he took the note from his brother in the beginning. “Okay, Strong and sturdy. You can count on me. Just keep me locked and you will see. I am tall and solid, all homes have me. To get me open, you first need a key.” Minho took Felix’s hand and placed a key into his palm, he said absolutely nothing else. Felix furrowed his eyebrows as he looked at Minho, trying to search for any sort of que that showed he wasn’t done talking but it never came.

“That’s it? You aren’t going to tell me what this opens? I get the riddle, it’s a door but what door does this unlock?” Minho moved to ruffle Felix’s hair before chuckling softly. “Think about it, who gave it to you?” He patted the younger’s cheek before walking away leaving Felix speechless. Who gave it to him? Minho obviously but this could mean anything. This could be a key to his favorite cat cafe for all Felix knew. He turned the key around in his hand, his eyes scanning the key only to stop everything that he was doing. The key had something engraved at the top. “ _ A place to call ours. _ ” He smiled at the simple phrase, it made it so obvious. It was a cute little touch to the clue. It was Minho and Jisung’s apartment key, but why were they sending him there of all places?

He made his way to their apartment with a soft hum, his mood wasn’t so bad now. It was kinda fun to walk around town and see everything the whole group had planned out just for him. He ended up at Minho’s apartment, his hand turning the key into the hole before opening the door. His eyes met with his brothers, his shoulders tensing as he yelped quietly. He wasn’t expecting someone to be staring back at him when he walked in. He clutched his shirt as he tried to calm himself down as Chan chuckled softly. “Sorry kiddo, didn’t mean to scare you. Ready for the final destination?” Felix nodded with a look that contradicted his actions. “Not gonna lie, I’m kinda nervous.” Chan hummed as he patted his brother back before taking a blindfold from his pocket.

“What the fuck-” Felix backed up against the door with a frown as he stared at his brother with a skeptical look. “Listen, the end thing is a surprise. It’s the best we could do, don’t worry I’ll guide you. I’m your brother, you can trust me.” Felix nodded with a soft sigh as he tried to push away his nerves bubbling up in his stomach. “Okay, I trust you.” He closed his eyes as the fabric brushed over his skin as Chan tied it behind his head. “Alright kiddo, just follow my lead.” They started walking, Chan grabbing his shoulders as he guided him around until they stopped. Birds chirping could be heard through his ears as the wind gently blew his hair into his face as the blindfold was removed. “Keep your eyes closed.”

Felix waited for a bit before opening his eyes despite the command, his gaze meeting Jeongin’s as the younger smiled nervously at the freckled male in front of him. “Sorry if the hunt was a bit extreme, I just wanted to make this the most creative thing so you won’t forget it and..” Felix rubbed his face as his eyebrows furrowed, Jeongin swallowed his nerves as he dared to ask what had Felix so upset. “That laptop riddle was utter fucking garbage! Do you know how many things that could have been!? Like a dresser..a drawer. A door for fucks sake! How was I supposed to know the answer? I hated it! Absolutely ha-” His voice was interrupted as Jeongin’s lips crashed against his own. The kiss had a rough start though it quickly softened as Jeongin moved his hands to cup Felix’s cheeks. 

Jeongin slowly broke the kiss, his eyes studying Felix’s expression. Felix stood shocked, before looking behind him to see if his brother was still there but it was just the two of them. He looked back at Jeongin before opening his mouth to say something but Jeongin beat him to it. “Felix I feel like I owe this to you, I shouldn’t keep this in anymore. I like you. Like, a lot..and I know you have a soulmate and you’ve kinda met them but I like you so much..I’ve dreamt of the day I would have the courage to tell you and I just wish I could have been your soulmate. You don’t have to say anything or even accept my feelings! I just..had to say them. Sorry for the scavenger hunt, I felt like it was a cute way to tell you plus it gave me time to prepare.” His voice trailed off as he looked at Felix with a look of utter nervousness. 

Felix felt his cheeks heat up as he tried to hide his blush with his hands, his eyes looking anywhere but Jeongin. He didn’t know what to say, it was the most thought out confession that he’s ever received. He looked over at Jeongin before smiling nervously, the younger was looking off at something as the wind blew through his light brown locks. “Jeongin.” He jumped slightly before meeting Felix’s gaze with a small smile. “You couldn’t have chosen a better time? I’m still in my work uniform.” Jeongin bit his lip as he suppressed a laugh, he shook his head as he took Felix’s hands into his. His thumb brushed along the top of his hand with a soft hum. “You still look gorgeous..” Felix shook his head before connecting their lips gently. “Jeongin, thank you for telling me. Your timing was horrendous but I loved the scavenger hunt no matter how much it annoyed me. I loved it.” 

Jeongin let out a relieved sigh as his eyes wandered to look away again, his lips curled into a slight smile as he rubbed his thumb against Felix’s hand. Felix tilted his head as he tried to get a better look to meet Jeongin’s gaze. “Hey..I accept your feelings, Jeongin.” His hand tilted Jeongin’s face up as their lips met again and again. Jeongin wrapped his arms around Felix’s neck as they deepened the kiss. Felix slowly pulled away as he felt a drop hit his cheek, he looked up only to notice the dark clouds covering the sky. Jeongin gasped as the rain slowly came down, the two males laughing as they ignored the rain pouring down in no time. 

They ignored the rain as they melted into each other’s kisses, the rain soaking their clothes to their bodies. Jeongin ended laughing against Felix’s lips as he rubbed their noses together. Felix moved Jeongin’s hair out of his eyes with a soft chuckle, they were beyond soaked but they didn’t care. This was probably the happiest they’ve been in their lives. The younger hummed contently as he looked into Felix’s eyes. The prettiest tone of grey he’s ever seen in his life. “So..does this mean we’re a thing?” Felix moved to kiss the other’s forehead before moving back to his lips. “Yeah, Jeongin you’re my boyfriend.” 

Jeongin practically squealed as he tried to contain his excitement. “Say it again.” Felix chuckled before pecking his lips. “You’re my boyfriend.” The two snuggled together for warmth, jumping when Minho laid on his horn as he parked his car. “Hey lovebirds! Get in here before you catch colds!” Jisung ran out of the car putting an umbrella over the two, Chan following as he wrapped a towel around them as he hugged them tightly. “Now Jeongin, now that you’re dating my baby brother. If you hurt him, I’ll kill you.” Jisung chipped in as he smiled brightly at the two. “And if Felix hurts Jeongin I’ll kill him!” 

The five of them went back to Chan’s house, Felix and Jeongin retreating to his room to get changed out of their wet clothes. The rest of the group waiting in the living room. Felix left the room first though he was still wearing his soaked clothes. “What? We may be dating now but I didn’t want to change in front of him in case it made him nervous. He was nervous enough to be wearing my clothes, like everything was soaked so he has to wear my..you know..boxers and stuff..” Jisung wasted no time, he was doubled over laughing. His hand gripped onto Minho as he tried to keep himself from falling off the couch. “Oh my god, I can’t..” Felix pouted as he looked down at his shoes embarrassed, his eyes focused on the small puddle he was making on the floor. Jeongin peeked out from Felix’s door with a shy look. “Felix..” Felix looked back before giving the younger a big grin.

Jeongin moved from behind the door his shy expression staying, wearing Felix’s clothes was something he never imagined happening so soon. “How do I look?” The group looked over at his outfit before giving him a thumbs up, Felix looking over the outfit before nodding in agreement. “Looks better on you, maybe you should keep it.” Jeongin shook his head before pulling Felix into his room. “Now you get dressed, you’ll get sick if you keep standing around wet.” The two smiled at each other before sharing a quick kiss, the interaction causing Minho to gag with a playful smirk to the two. “Get a room.” Jeongin looked away embarrassed as he waited by Felix’s closed door, his hands playing with the sweater he was wearing.

* * *

Minho was right, Felix and Jeongin now laid under layers of covers as Chan checked up on them every once in awhile. Jeongin was cuddled up to Felix as he ran his fingers through his hair, Felix staring up at the ceiling blankly. He only looked away once Chan walked into his room with a soft sigh as he ran his hand over Felix’s forehead. “Still sick kiddo. I called you in, they probably think you’re dying.” Felix hummed as he sniffled before turning to face Jeongin, his head nuzzling into his neck with a soft yawn. “Mmmkay..” Chan sighed before moving Felix, making the male face him instead. “Quit cuddling with each other, you’re just sharing your germs.” Felix whined though he obeyed, his face burying into his blanket.

“Get some rest kiddo, I’ll check up on you in an hour.” Chan ran his hand through Felix’s hair as he hummed in response. Felix pulled his blanket to his chin as he fell asleep slowly, his eyes opening after awhile to Changbin sleeping in the chair next to Felix’s bed. He sat up slowly as he coughed into his arm with a small sniffle afterwards. Changbin woke up to the sounds, his body sitting up as he looked over at Felix. “Hey Felix, Chan went to the store so he asked me to look after you guys. Jeongin is in the shower, he says he’s feeling better though you seem to be feeling like utter shit hm?” Felix wiped his nose with the back of his hand before flopping back down into his bed. “My head hurts.”

Changbin’s hand gently ran over his forehead before sighing softly. “You’re burning up kid, are you hungry? I can get you some soup.” Felix shrugged, his body moving to roll over in his bed as his hands pulled the blanket over his head. “Felix don’t do that, you’ll overheat. Come on, let’s get you some food.” Changbin tugged the blanket down as he smiled down at the freckled boy. “Let me sleep..” He whined as he tried pulling the blanket back but Changbin wasn’t giving in. “You’ve slept all day, you need food in you Felix.” Felix sighed though he sat up anyways, his body moving to the kitchen. He plopped down onto his chair as he rested his head into his palm, his eyes drooping as he tried his best to keep awake. 

Changbin put a bowl in front of him, his body sitting on the chair next to his as he watched Felix drift off to sleep. “Felix, you can sleep right after.” He snapped his fingers next to the younger’s face earning a soft sigh in response. “I’m up..” He lifted his head as he played with the spoon with a long exhale. Changbin nibbled his lip before taking the spoon in his own hands as he scooped up some of the spoon. “Open.” Felix scrunched his nose up in disgust as he stared at Changbin, his cheeks dusting red as he slowly opened his mouth. Changbin sighed heavily as he fed Felix, his head resting in his spare hand. “You’re just one big baby.” 

Felix was about to protest but Chan walked into the house with a hum, “Oh Felix, how are you feeling kiddo?” He ran his hand through Felix’s messy hair before resting his cheek onto Felix’s forehead. “Not good?” He rubbed his brother’s shoulders as the other took his own spoon back, the metal resting between his lips as he leaned back against Chan. “Mmm..” Chan glanced over at Changbin who seemed tired himself as well. “Changbin shit, I hope you didn’t catch his cold. You can go home, I’ll take care of him alone.” Changbin sniffled before shaking his head with a smile, “Nah I’m good. I get sick easily so I don’t really care if I catch it, he seems kinda hopeless so I’m fine with helping.” Felix blinked tiredly as he played with his spoon before Changbin sighed and took it back, his eyes rolling as he scooped more soup. “Open.”

Chan raised his eyebrow as he watched the interaction, Changbin feeding his little brother seemed weird though it seemed to be working. Felix cooperated well, something about Changbin had Felix in a tight grip. The two just fit nicely, he’s never seen people give into someone else that easily. Especially not Felix, he’s too stubborn to let someone  _ feed  _ him. Maybe it was a soulmate thing, just a vibe they have. He watched as he unloaded the groceries with Jeongin who was now out of the shower looking healthy as ever. “Is Felix that sleepy that he has to have Changbin feed him?” Chan shrugged as he looked over at his brother before moving his attention back to Jeongin. “I guess so, I’ve never seen him like this. I guess he’s just pretty sick.” 

Jeongin hummed before moving to hug Felix from the back. “Hey Lixie, I’m gonna go and apply for your bookstore so I can help out. Then later when you’re all better we can work together okay?” Felix looked up tiredly before smiling slightly. “Mmmkay..” Jeongin smiled before kissing his forehead as he brushed the others bangs out of his face. “Get better love, for me okay?” Felix nodded before pecking the younger’s lips quickly before going back to his soup. “Oi! No no, no kissing! You’ll get him sick all over again.” Chan sighed before gently pushing Jeongin out of the house with a smile. “Bye Jeongin, I’ll let you know when Felix is out of quarantine.” 

Jeongin poked his head in the door frame with a small grin. “One sec please Chan. Felix babe!” Felix looked back with a sniffle before studying his boyfriend waiting for the response. “I’ll miss you, get better soon.” He blew a kiss to the other with a smile as he waved goodbye before leaving the three alone. Changbin cleared his throat before getting up from the table, his hands picking up the empty bowl with a slight frown. When did that relationship develop? His heart gave a soft pang as he watched Felix smile to himself before getting up to go back to bed. Changbin was happy and in his own relationship, so why was he feeling like utter shit when Felix was doing the same?


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the one with the awkward tension

Felix rolled out of bed groggily before sighing heavily, Chan poking his head in upon hearing the sound. “Hey Felix, feeling better?” He moved into the room, his hand moving under his bangs to rest against Felix’s forehead. “Not so warm anymore, I’d say you’re able to go back to work. Take a long shower, don’t worry about being late for work. Jeongin actually starts work today..don’t you wanna train your boyfriend~?” Chan cooed softly as he watched Felix look away embarrassed at the title. 

He got up from his bed shortly after, his hands grabbing his work uniform before heading into the bathroom with a soft mumble to himself. He stood in the shower for what seemed like forever, his head tilted so the water ran down his forehead and along his shoulders slowly. His eyes closed as he took a deep breath relaxing with the warm water running down his back. He might have fallen asleep if it wasn’t for his brother pounding on the door with soft laughter. “Lix come on! Someone is here to see you!” Felix wrapped the towel around his waist as he opened the door, his hands holding another towel as he dried his face. He looked up only to have his jaw drop with a dark blush creeping onto his face. He pulled the towel to his chest as he looked away quickly. His eyes avoiding any contact with Jeongin as he gripped the towel close to his body. “Oh hey Jeongin..I’ll be ready in a sec!” He smiled before rushing into his room leaving the others in silence.

Jeongin smiled once Felix walked out of his room fully clothed, his uniform top sticking out half tucked in and sticking out in the back. Jeongin hummed softly before wrapping his arms around the other’s waist as his hands slowly pushed the elder’s shirt into his pants. “There you go..” He looked up to glance at Felix but all he saw was his side of his face as his cheeks stained a dark shade of gray. Chan smiled as he brought the two into a tight hug before kissing the top of his brother’s head. “Keep your hands to yourselves, love you. Have a good day at work.” Felix nodded before taking Jeongin’s hand and walking out of the house with his lips spread into a huge grin. 

Jeonging didn’t talk the whole way, Felix was talking his ear off but he didn’t mind it that much. He was so excited to work with his new boyfriend he just kept rambling away. “And babe oh my gosh! We can close up together and even snuggle in my favorite corner and read together until it gets too dark to read.” He smiled as his head nuzzled into Jeongin’s arm before continuing as he spoke softly just for the two to hear. “And..just between us we can kiss a little in the spots that the camera can’t get to.” He smiled up at the other shyly as he chuckled softly in response. “Sure Felix.” He kissed the side of Felix’s head before opening the door to the bookstore, his hand waving to their boss with a grin. “Oh Jeongin you must know Felix, and it seems you are very close with him.” 

Felix gushed as he snuggled into Jeongin before pecking his cheek, leaving to clock in as Jeongin continued to talk with the boss. Felix walked out with a soft hum, his arm getting pulled as his body was pulled to the side as the boss smiled down at him. “Felix sweetie, I’ve learned that you two are dating so please keep it professional when there’s eyes on you okay? My eyes won’t get bothered since young love is adorable and I’m happy for you two but refrain from it when there’s customers okay?” Felix nodded quickly as he moved to turn and walk back to his station only for his boss to move his body to face her again. “Hold on kid, go train your boyfriend, the person who trained you quit a few weeks ago so you’re the only one who knows this place like the back of your hand. I have to fill out some paperwork. Thanks lix.” Felix gasped softly before taking Jeongin’s hand into his as he pulled his body close to his.

“Hey guess what?” Jeongin looked over from his book in his hands to look over at the other as he smiled eagerily. “Hm?” He put the book back onto the shelf before running his fingers through Felix’s hair as he waited for the answer from the overly excited male next to him. “I get to train you! I can show you everything that I know..” He smiled widely before it faded quickly. “Though there’s not much to learn..it’s kinda really easy.” Jeongin moved his hands to cup the other’s face before pressing their foreheads together as he softly spoke. “Hey..teach me the ropes lix” The elder smiled shyly before dragging Jeongin all around the store before stopping at the register, his fingers pointing at all the buttons as he spoke softly. “And that’s basically it.”

Jeongin smiled running his fingers along Felix’s back as he leaned against the counter with his face resting in his palms, his eyes closed as he tried to stay awake. “Lixie..” Jeongin’s fingers moved to rub the other’s neck before tucking his shirt tag back into place. “Did you get enough sleep yesterday?” Felix hummed in response, shivering slightly with Jeongin’s touch. Jeongin titled his head before kissing the back of his neck gently. His eyes crinkling into a smile as he watched the other shiver with every soft touch he gave. “You’re so sensitive here aren’t you?” Felix smiled before running his hand to rub the back of his neck as he looked away with a soft chuckle. “I get that a lot, Chan always tickles me there when he wants to get me to say something I’ve been hiding.” 

Jeongin laughed softly before tickling his neck, Felix’s shoulders tensing as he softly giggled as he tried to move from the younger. “Tell me something I don’t know Felix hm~?” He pulled the other into a tight hug as his lips curled into a small grin. “You know everything Jeongin, I’m not hiding anything from you.” The younger pressed his lip against Felix’s cheek before sitting on top of the counter, his hands pulling Felix’s body to stand between his legs. “Is it always this slow?” The elder shook his head as he leaned his back against his boyfriend, his eyes closing as his body relaxed instantly. “Yeah but only on Tuesdays no one really comes in.” Jeongin hummed before tilting the other’s head up before pecking Felix’s lips gently. “Can we go read in your corner then?”

Felix’s eyes opened as his whole face lit up before pulling Jeongin to the small window sill with the small pillow waiting for him. Jeongin sat onto the sill as he watched Felix run his fingers along the books before taking one out with a smile. “Okay, this is my favorite!” He moved Jeongin’s body to lean against the pillow before sitting between his legs as he leaned against him. His head resting on the younger’s shoulder as his fingers opened the book. Jeongin’s arms snaked around Felix’s waist as the other read softly for the two, his deep voice sounding like pure bliss to the younger as the two snuggled into each other.

Their shift ended eventually, Felix ended up falling asleep onto Jeongin as the younger ran his fingers through his hair, his eyes looked out the window when he wasn’t pointing out things to the few customers that came. He couldn’t have gotten up without waking up the other so he just apologized but did his job as he helped out the people who asked. Jeongin smiled before rubbing his boyfriend’s back as he softly spoke up. “Felix..wake up.” Felix groaned softly before sitting up with a light blush. “Shit I fell asleep..” He got up quickly before walking to their boss’s office with a shy look. His voice was soft as they spoke, the woman laughing off whatever he said as she ruffled his hair. “Get lost you two, shift is over anyways. And Felix? Don’t stress about it okay bud? You just got over being sick, Jeongin did well in your place.” Felix nibbled his lip as he nodded before looking over at the younger as he took his hand slowly. Their fingers interlocked as Jeongin leaned into his body, his lips brushing against Felix’s ear. “Don’t worry, we weren’t that busy.” His voice a soft whisper before moving to kiss the corner of the other’s lips. “Okay?”

Felix turned his head to look at the younger, his lips forming a slight pout as his eyes gave a soft doe look. Jeongin hummed before peppered several kisses onto his face. “Okay Felix?” Felix lips curled into a grin as he softly let out a laugh. “Okay okay!” His hands went to hold Jeongin’s head still before locking their lips together passionatly. The people walking past them on the streets cooing at the young love of the two bookstore workers. Felix slowly backed away before smiling brightly at the younger. “Wanna stay over tonight? Chan is gonna make pancakes for dinner!” His eyes lit up like stars before softening as Jeongin smiled back. “Sure, let’s just go to my house and grab some clothes first.” Felix shook his head as he played with Jeongin’s shirt idly. “You can just wear my clothes.” His hands straightened the younger’s uniform before meeting his gaze with an innocent grin.

“Or you can wear mine.” Jeongin lips quirked up into a smirk as he watched Felix malfunction at the thought. “Yeah..” His voice was soft as he intertwined their fingers again as they started walking towards the younger’s house. “Felix I love how fast I can make you shy, your confidence is all over the place with me.” Felix crinkled his nose with a grin before flashing his teeth as his smile grew bigger. Jeongin almost lost it, the freckled boy smiling so cutely, his lips so kissable as they curled up into such a gorgeous smile. “God Felix..I like you so much.” Felix’s teeth nibbled his bottom lip before shaking his head to the statement. “Well I like you more!” He playfully stuck his tongue out before cowering as Jeongin leaned against him with a smirk. “Felix I have had a crush on you for three years, there’s no way.”

“Woah..three years..” Felix’s voice was soft as he swung their hands back and forth as they walked, his body idly standing by Jeongin’s mirror as he posed, his eyes scanning his outfit before staring at his boyfriend as he picked out clothes from his dresser. Their eyes meeting as Jeongin looked over, his eyes soft as he blew a kiss to the other before turning his attention to packing a bag for himself. Felix almost melted as he looked down with a dark blush, the two moving from friends into boyfriends was just so surreal. He just wanted to be always with Jeongin and the urge to kiss him comes again and again. His heart raced like he’s ran a mile every time the younger even touches him. If he feels this way for Jeongin how would he react to his own soulmate? He couldn’t think of that though, the world didn’t want him to meet his soulmate properly. At least not yet. For now he has to focus on what he has, he has to focus on the present. 

They left and ate dinner with Chan and now they’re admiring their work in the living room, pillows stacked along with blankets tacked to walls as it formed a huge fort over the TV. It took every single trick in the book to have Chan give into the idea of having the two sleep out in the living room in some huge pillow fort that included his TV. Felix was cuddled up to Jeongin, the two sharing a blanket as their bodies pressed against each other. Popcorn sat between his legs as they watched a movie, Felix’s hands feeding Jeongin popcorn every once in awhile even though the younger was more than capable to feed himself. Felix only stopped when Jeongin took his fingers into his along with a soft comment, “Tiny hands~” Felix scoffed at the comment but he didn’t hesitate to hold the younger’s hand, he loved the feeling of someone’s fingers slotting between his own. Before he knew it Chan was taking down the fort and gently shaking his body to wake him up. “Felix, kiddo wake up..” 

Felix groaned softly before rolling over, his body burying into the remaining blankets. Chan sighed softly before picking up his brother and taking him to his bedroom. “You have five minutes.” He set a timer on his phone before walking out of the room. “Sorry guys, Felix is always hard to wake up. He’ll be out soon.” Jeongin hummed before moving to Felix’s room, his body laying on top of the other’s with a smile. “Wake up!” Felix’s eyes opened slowly before gasping softly. “Jeongin!” His cheeks burned as the younger leaned down to peck his lips. “Hm? Why do you seem so nervous?” The younger’s head tilted with a small smirk before brushing Felix’s hair away from his face. 

“I’m not ready for  _ this _ ..” Felix’s voice was soft as Jeongin stared down at the other dumbfounded. “Felix huh? No you dork, I’m just waking you up!” He scurried off of Felix quickly as the other sat up with a look of embarrassment. “Oh right..right haha..” He smiled before pulling his blanket to hide his blushing cheeks before looking over at the younger with large doe eyes. Jeongin chuckled before gently kissing his forehead, “Get dressed pumpkin, you’re wearing the same outfit from yesterday.” Felix hummed as he watched the other walk out of the room and close his door behind him. Felix pulled new clothes over his head before walking out of his room, his hand rubbing his eyes before blinking at the whole crowd watching him. Go won sitting on his own couch as she ran her fingers through Changbin’s hair as he watched the TV. Minho sitting next to them sort of, having a gap between the two couples as Jisung sat on his lap happily. Jeongin sat on the floor as Chan was standing behind the couch with his arms crossed.

“What’s all this..?” Felix tilted his head as he looked around at everyone over before looking at his brother. Chan smiled before pulling Felix under his arm, his other hand ruffling his hair. “Game night. Celebrating you not being sick with something you enjoy so much.” Felix’s lips curled into a big grin before hopping onto the couch where the gap was, his hands grabbing the remote to switch the channel so he could hook up his gaming system. Changbin sighed as the TV channel was changed but ignored it when he noticed how happy the younger was beside him. “What’s for food?” Minho’s body leaned back over the couch ledge as Chan looked up from the book that leaned against the counter. “Some ramen thing Felix pinned on my pintrest a few weeks ago.” Felix’s ears perked up before giggling to himself, his fingers mashing buttons as he played his game with a huge grin. 

“Hey Lixie, lemme play next round.” Jisung offered his hand only to have another controller be placed in his hand. “It’s multiplayer so we can play together, loser has to buy the winner coffee next visit to the cafe.” Jisung hummed as he leaned against his boyfriend. “Deal.” His attention turned to Minho before softly whispering to him, “Babe do you know how to play this?” The question earning a soft snort from Minho as he wrapped his arms around Jisung, “Have fun paying for Felix’s coffee.” Jisung groaned softly as he tried his best to just get lucky with button mashing but his face dropped once his side of the screen flashed with defeat. Felix’s body jumped up as he punched the air with an evil laugh. “He loses! Who may be the next challenger? I remain..undefeatable!” Changbin grabbed Jisung’s controller as he started a new round, Felix’s eyes narrowing as he started to mash the buttons as his tongue slipped out as he concentrated on the screen.

Felix’s jaw dropped as he stared at the screen as Changbin smirked, his face full of pride as his side of the screen flashed with victory. Everyone stared at the freckled male as his face screwed up as he tried to keep his composure but it only lasted a second as he started to whimper. Jeongin looked back at the elder before tilting his head as he watched the other break down. Chan looked up from the food before dropping the spoon he was holding. His hands cupped his brothers cheeks as he leaned over him with a soft sigh. “Felix, kiddo don’t cry about a game.” Chan kissed his forehead before smiling softly as his fingers ran under the younger’s eyes. Felix looked up at his brother with huge doe eyes as his lips formed a pout. “But..but! You know this is my favorite game! I lost to Changbin of  _ all people.  _ That’s such a hit to my self esteem!” Changbin raised his eyebrow before chuckled softly, his hand tossing the controller onto the couch as Jeongin took it before resting his head against Felix’s thigh. 

Felix ended up sitting between Jeongin’s legs as his arms wrapped the other’s waist, the rest of the males along with Go won ended up sitting at the table with a few drinks into their systems. Watching Felic and Jeongin play games was boring them, instead they started placing bets on who would win and making the losers take a shot. Go won stared blankly at the screen before shaking her head, her blonde hair running down her shoulder as she rested her head down into her hand. “How much longer do you think they’ll play?” Chan hummed as he placed plates onto the table before leaning against the wall, his voice softly calling out for his brother. Felix shot up quickly before staring at the group with a nervous look. Jeongin stood up before looking at what had his boyfriend so nervous before sighing softly. “You okay? If you’re uncomfortable with it I can get your food for you.” Felix nodded before slouching into the couch as Jeongin grabbed a big bowl for the two to share as he spoke softly to the group. 

“Chan you, of all people, should know how your brother reacts to intoxication. I can’t believe you guys call yourselves his friends. His  _ family. _ ” Chan moved from his spot as he shook his head, his hand moving his hair out of his face. “I’m not even drunk Innie..” He moved to stand next to the couch before kneeling next to Felix. “No Chan, don’t talk to me.” He moved away from the other before peeking over his shoulder. “You’re annoying. Go away.” Chan chuckled before ruffling the younger’s hair as he protested, Jeongin moved to sit next to his boyfriend as he offered him a fork. “Here, I got us food to share.”

The two ate together on the couch as Chan ate with the rest at the table, Minho and Jisung were attached by the lips as they drunkenly made out as the others tried to ignore the couple next to them. Go won had fallen asleep as she leaned her head against the wall behind her. Felix studied the scene behind him, Chan and Changbin softly talking as the other two that were still awake were basically sucking their faces off. He shuddered before looking back at the younger next to him but something seemed off, his hands held his phone as his face was scrunched up. “Felix, babe I gotta go. See you tomorrow at work.” His lips quickly pecked his cheek before rushing out of the house leaving Felix alone on the couch. Though he wasn’t alone for long, Changbin now sat next to him with a soft sigh before looking over at the other. 

Felix stared back at the other before smiling nervously, “Can I help you?” Changbin smiled before he started to learn into the younger, Felix’s eyes widened before moving his face away quickly. The other’s lips brushed against the freckled cheek before they gently moved down to his neck. Felix had no idea what was happening, this should have felt  _ so wrong  _ but he didn’t know why he couldn’t bring himself to push Changbin away. Felix gripped Changbin’s shirt as his eyebrows furrowed slightly, his mouth opened as Changbin’s kiss became sloppier. His skin was getting bitten gently, he had no idea what had been going through Changbin’s mind but he for sure knew he wasn’t sober enough to know what he’s doing to the poor boy. Chan must have been busy since he wasn’t intervening with anything Felix was doing, though the younger kind of enjoyed the attention from Changbin. It was if things normal people did were ten times better if Changbin were doing them. Chan was busy, he was desperately trying to stop Minho from having sex with Jisung on his own kitchen table as their kisses started to get heated. “I hate you horny drunks..” 

The rest of the night was a blur, Felix ended up waking up on the couch with a blanket wrapped around his body. He sat up with a confused look, what happened after Changbin had kissed him? He rubbed his neck before rolling his back with a deep groan. Whatever happened last night must’ve not mattered all that anyways. He got up from his spot as he quickly got ready for work, his arms stretching above his head as he yawned. Jeongin’s arms wrapped around his waist before his lips pecked Felix’s. “Is everything okay Innie..? Yesterday you ran off and..” Jeongin smiled as he cupped Felix’s face before his eyes softened as their eyes met. “It’s alright..don’t worry. How was...the party..?” His eyes moved to study Felix’s uniform but his eyes stopped at his neck, his honey skin had a small mark to it that he for sure didn’t put there himself. His lips pulled into a tight frown before patting his boyfriend’s head, his body turning as he started to stock the shelves with the new books they had gotten.

Felix clocked in before starting to help Jeongin in silence, neither of them had said a word. Felix would look up every so often before looking back down with a nervous look, the atmosphere of the whole place felt off. It felt heavy as they did their job with no interactions between the two. Once they finished with that part Felix smiled as he grabbed Jeongin’s arm though it slid out of his grasp while the younger walked away. “Hey Jeongin wa-” Once his arm was out of Felix’s grasp he stopped in his tracks, his eyes watching the younger walk away and sit at the counter behind the register. His hands grabbed a book as he leaned against the wall reading, leaving Felix to wondering about what happened in the brief moments they met for. 

He sat in the window sill they read together in just yesterday as he tried to think of what could possibly have happened. Maybe he was still upset about what happened yesterday night and just didn’t feel like talking? He hugged the pillow to his chest as he tried to convince himself that that was what was bothering the other. His eyes closed tightly as he gripped the pillow tighter, his knuckles turning white as he tried to keep his cries soft, their conversation stopped so abruptly after Jeongin had asked about the party. Did that have anything to do with it? Was he just upset he had to leave Felix? He looked up from his spot, his head cranning back to look over at Jeongin hoping to catch him staring at him but he still had his nose shoved into a book. Felix sighed before looking out the window before getting up walking around the store aimlessly. He stopped in front of the counter, his hands pressed to the counter as he pushed his body up to read the book Jeongin was. The younger furrowed his eyebrows before his hands closed the book. 

Felix smiled widely at the other but he only got Jeongin walking away again as a reaction. His smile quickly faded as he turned to see where the younger went this time. His eyes watered all over again as he sat on the counter, his head hanging low as the soft ring of the bell above the door rang. “Felix?” Go won’s voice rang through the air before he raised his face, his lip trembling before he ran into the girl and flung his arms around her. His mouth let sobs out as she gently rubbed his back after a moment of shock. “Oh gosh Felix what happened..?” She looked over at Jeongin as he peeked over the bookshelves he was stocking with a slightly pained expression mixed with annoyance. “Did you two get into a fight..?” Her voice was soft as she looked back down at the male sobbing into her chest. “I- I don’t know! I thought it was just him being upset that he left me yesterday with a bunch of drunks but now he’s ignoring me and ..and- we just started dating. I don’t know what I could have done wrong already..” His hands wiped his cheeks as he tried to catch his breath as he poured his heart to Go won in a rush. She blinked as he blabbered away quickly before stopping to let himself breath. “Why don’t you ask him what’s wrong..? If he ignores you Felix you have to  _ make  _ him sit down and talk to you. Nothing is going to be resolved if you don’t explain what’s bothering you. I only came here to check up on you, Chan seemed worried since he wasn’t able to wake up and make you breakfast this morning..did you eat? Are you hungry? I brought you two snacks..”

Felix took the snacks with a soft sigh before watching Go won leave as well, his eyes wandering to Jeongin only to see the back of his head yet again. His heart ached as he sat down behind the counter, his fingers opening the snacks he had gotten before munching on them quietly. Once it was the end of their shift his cheeks were somewhat soaked as his eyebrows creased in their almost permanent furrowed position. “Jeongin wait.” He pulled his boyfriend’s body back as he tried to leave the store without saying a word to anyone. “Why are you ignoring me..? I’m sorry if I upset you in any way, I just don’t know what happened between us..” The younger took a deep breath before turning to face the other with a dark look. “You want to know why I’ve been ignoring you?” Felix nodded quickly, “Yes! I can’t fix anything without knowing what I did wrong.” 

“It’s because you cheated on me Felix, you didn’t even think to hide it. I know you’re sweet and innocent but now it looks like that’s more of an act. Who gave it to you?” Felix was shocked, his mouth gaped open before blinking in shock. “Gave what? What do you mean?” Jeongin groaned before running his hands down his face, “Felix please, I can not handle you playing dumb. Next time you get a hickey, fucking cover it up with makeup so I can at least think that my boyfriend isn’t off with some other person behind my back.” With that said Jeongin left the store in a huff leaving Felix frozen in place. He rushed to the bathroom as he pulled his uniform down to get a better look of his skin and sure enough, right above his collarbone was a dark red mark. He rubbed at his skin with a frantic look, was this from Changbin!? He ran out of the bathroom and out of the store as he tried to find Jeongin but he was long gone. Felix tugged at his hair as his teeth gritted. How could he let this happen?! 

He ran home as fast as he could, once he got there he slammed his brother’s door open as he screamed out to his big brother. “Chan I think Changbin gave me a hickey!” Chan sat on his bed dumbfounded, when did Changbin have time to do that? He rubbed his forehead before patting the bed for Felix to sit down. “Are you sure it was Changbin and not Jeongin?” Felix nodded quickly, “Jeongin got super pissed about it so it’s obviously not from him and the other person I’ve ever had a kiss with is Changbin! Well we didn’t technically kiss but..” Chan’s eyes opened wide as he stared at his brother, “Felix what?” Felix wailed as his tears soaked the pillow case of the pillow he had held to his chest. “I just couldn’t help it- it was like there was this force keeping me there but I didn’t hate it..I-I’m the worst boyfriend ever!” He sobbed loudly as he hugged the pillow closer, his body leaning against his brother as Chan wrapped his arm around his waist. “Felix..” He didn’t know how to finish the sentence, he knew the key point in the whole story that no one else knew. He knew why Felix just couldn’t stop such an interaction with Changbin even when he was in a relationship. It was because Jeongin wasn’t the missing key, Changbin was. Changbin was the one person that was made for Felix and Chan didn’t know what to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi omg im sorry i left my fics so dry!! insomnia will be updated soon if you also read that book of mine <3


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the one where jeongin is a petty brat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELP IM SORRY I LEFT ALL MY FICS SO DRY AHHHH

Felix sat in his normal spot in the cafe, his back leaning against the window as he sipped his drink quietly. Jeongin sat next to him with a blank expression, his eyes stared at the table before darting up once Jisung opened his mouth. “Bro what the fuck? We worked our asses off to make this scavenger hunt and you guys aren’t even cuddly? Like Jeongin please just squeeze Lix’s thigh or something. Kiss him please, this  _ hurts  _ me to watch.” Jeongin glanced over at Felix before taking a slow breath. His body shifted in his seat before he rested his head against Felix’s shoulder. “This fine?”

Jisung’s mouth dropped as his eyes darted between Felix’s hurt expression then back to Jeongin. “Wait..what happened between you two?” Felix smiled before getting up from his spot leaving the whole group silent. Chan sighed deeply before getting up from the table, “I’ll go talk to him..” He walked up to the counter as Felix was counting his money with a distressed expression. “Lix, kiddo I got it.” Chan swiped his card before taking him aside. His eyes widened as he noticed the tears welling up in his eyes, his hands quickly moving to his eyes as his lip quivered. “Oh Felix…” Felix shook his head as he turned away, his hands running through his hair as he deeply exhaled. “I’ll be at home, I’m not feeling good.” 

Felix left the cafe, his shoes hitting the sidewalk as he ran all the way to his room. He slammed his door before his body slid down his door as he took deep shaky breaths. His hands picked up his phone before dialing Go won with a nervous sigh as she picked up. “Felix? What’s up?” Felix didn’t think, he just blurted out what was on his mind. “Hey uh-- is Changbin with you? I really need him..” Go won hummed before a male’s voice was on the phone. “Hello?” Felix bit his lip before quietly sobbing. “Changbin..” His voice wavered as he heard the male say his name before hanging up. He sniffled before slowly opening his room as he slumped on the couch. Before long, Changbin was next to him along with Chan. Both of them rubbing his back and shoulders as Changbin softly whispered to him as his hand ran through his hair strands.

“Do you want me to stay here Felix? I can leave if you want, whatever makes you comfortable..” Felix shook his head as he gripped Changbin’s shirt tightly. “St-stay..but Chan..” Changbin tilted his head before rubbing the small of Felix’s back, “What about him?” He took a soft shaky breath before pushing his brother away. “I understand kiddo.” He made eye contact with Changbin, the elder nodded before going back to looking at the younger. There was silence between the two, Felix’s hand slowly intertwining with the other’s as he nuzzled his head into Changbin’s neck. The two stayed there quietly before a soft snoring interrupted it. Changbin glanced over at the younger before chuckling softly as he rested his head against the other’s as his eyes slowly closed. 

Jisung stumbled into the room with a soft giggle before covering his mouth as he shushed the group behind him. Changbin’s eyes opened before waving at the group with the hand that wasn’t locked into Felix’s. Jeongin’s eyes locked onto him before sighing softly, “Felix doesn’t want to see me anyways.” He began to leave but his body didn’t get very far as Minho gripped onto his shirt. “He’s asleep. Stop being a dick. You’re going to sort this out with him.” Jeongin huffed before glaring at Changbin. “God it’s always him!” Changbin’s eyebrows rose as he scoffed softly, “What is that supposed to mean?” Jeongin rolled his eyes as he crossed his arms with a frown. “Felix is always with  _ you. _ When he was panicking about his soulmate it was you who was up his ass. And at the party you were the one he was closest to. And look at this!” 

Changbin slowly took his hand out of Felix’s before standing up with a blank face. “I can’t believe you’re mad that I help him with his anxiety. He called  _ me  _ when he was feeling at his worst. I’m just a friend for him and I don’t know why you’re so pissy about me helping him out.” Felix lifted his head before shriveling into the couch, “Changbin..thanks for helping. You can go back to Go won now..tell her I’m sorry I ruined your date.” Changbin looked back at Felix, his annoyed expression easing away quickly. “I’ll always be able to help. Next time just call me, have Chan give you my number.” He turned to Jeongin before narrowing his eyes, their shoulders bumping into each other as he walked away. “Purely platonic.” 

Felix took a deep breath in before starting to move back to his room. “Hey hey hey no. Felix you’re staying here.” Jisung gently took his hand before pulling his body into a hug. His voice was soft as he spoke to the younger with a soothing tone. “Hey babes..if it becomes too much just squeeze my hand. You two need to sort this out, you’ve dated for a week. You shouldn’t be already fighting.” Jisung sat him back down on the couch as Minho pushed Jeonging towards Felix gently. “Now Jeongin, talk to Felix.”

Jeongin frowned before staring at Felix, “Who gave it to you?” Jisung’s head tilted before mouthing words to Minho as he sat behind Jeongin. “I told you I don’t know. I only have a slight idea on who did it.” Jeongin raised his eyebrow before Felix continued. “He was so drunk so you can’t just go skipping to Changbin and trying to ki-” Jisung covered Felix’s mouth before clicking his tongue. “Oh my god that is juicy but that’s all we needed to know. Jeongin, Changbin was totally shit-faced that night so let’s not take it out on poor little Felix. The boy is literally the most innocent guy I know.” 

“I don’t care if he was drunk or not. Felix, you let it happen and then refused to tell me.” Felix frowned before moving Jisung’s hand with a dark expression. “I told you I didn’t know about it! I was just as surprised as you were. Why won’t you believe me?!” Jeongin furrowed his eyebrows before scoffing. “How did you not see it when you got changed?” Felix shrugged before rubbing his collarbone gently. “I’m not very observant in the morning, I was tired and I slept in and I was late for work so I just threw my uniform on.” Jeongin rolled his eyes before starting to get up before getting shoved back down by Minho. “Jeongin dear god quit being petty, this is your  _ boyfriend.  _ Look at him and tell him what he can do to fix this.” Jisung shook his head before rubbing Felix’s back gently. “No don’t just pin this on him babe, you guys have to figure out how you can both fix this.”

Felix shifted in his seat before taking a deep breath. “I’ll do anything..” Jeongin was taken back before looking away with a slight frown before looking back at Felix as he met eye contact before taking a long exhale. “God..come here Lix..” Felix whined before tackling Jeongin as he nuzzled his head into the younger's chest. Jisung smiled as he moved to sit with Minho as he ran his hand through Felix’s hair. “Jeongin I’m sorry. I swear I didn’t want this, I like you..I really do.” Jeongin lifted the other’s face before humming softly. “What will I ever do with you..” Felix smiled before pecking Jeongin’s lips timidly. 

“Felix you can kiss me, I should’ve listened to your side before getting so mad over something you probably didn’t even know about.” Minho snickered softly as he spoke to Jisung quietly. Jeongin turned to look over before humming softly. “What are you guys laughing about?” Jisung covered his mouth as his eyes crinkled as he laughed to himself. “No...Minho oh my god.” Felix sat up before pulling Jeongin up off the couch, “Ignore them, they’re so annoying. Come on let’s just go hang out in my room.” Jisung whistled before smirking at the two, “Jeongin is gonna make more marks all over our baby lixie!” Felix blinked before looking at Jeongin as his cheeks were a dark red. 

Jeongin laughed nervously before looking over at Felix before stopping immediately. “Lix?” Felix nibbled his lip before rubbing his arm nervously. “You..you can if you wanna..” Jeongin’s mouth dropped before kissing his jaw gently. “You’re just saying that.” Felix shook his head as he tilted his head back, his fingers rubbing his neck before smiling shyly. Jeongin looked over at Chan’s room before tugging the elder into his room with a hum. Jisung’s mouth gaped before he tilted his head back as he began laughing, his hand moving to his mouth as Minho shook his head with a smile. “Babe shut up, you’re gonna ruin this for them if you’re so loud. Chan’s gonna come out and-” 

“And what?” Chan stood in his room with his arms crossed across his chest. Jisung’s laughter stopped as his air caught in his throat with a nervous look. “And be so proud of us fixing your little brother’s relationship!” Chan hummed before glancing over at his brother’s closed door before opening the fridge with a hum. “Are you two planning to stay for dinner then? I’m assuming Jeongin is in with Felix and is staying the night. Minho leaned back as he looked at the blonde with a small smile. “Sure, but you’re chill with Jeongin staying the night? You’re not going to go super protective big brother mode?”

Chan shrugged as he got out a pan before looking over at Minho. “Why? I trust my brother. Besides, Felix is so innocent that I don’t really have to worry much.” Jisung hummed before nodding, his mouth curling into a smile before blurting out. “Jeongin may or may not be giving Felix a hickey!” Chan dropped his spatula before furrowing his brow with a hum. “Felix!” The freckled boy poked his head out of his room before walking out, his hands intertwined with each other behind his back as he stared back at his brother. “Yeah?” Chan tilted the younger’s jaw up as he checked every inch of his neck before smiling. “Good boy.” 

Felix blinked before pulling his collar down. “Wait are you looking for this?” Chan’s mouth dropped as he cupped Felix’s cheeks with a soft gasp. “Felix kiddo..oh my god..one two..three..” Felix pulled his collar up with a blush, “Stop..it felt good..” Jisung threw his head back as he snorted, his hand gripped Minho’s shirt as he tried to keep himself from falling off the couch. Jeongin poked his head out of the door with an embarrassed look before smiling at Chan, “Hey..” Chan took a deep breath before smiling as he patted Felix’s head. “I can’t keep you innocent forever..you may go around as you please. You are an adult now. You have a job and everything. You’re...responsible enough..” His voice drifted before whining as he pulled his brother into the kitchen. 

“How many are there?” Felix shrugged before peeking into his shirt. “Hm..five.” He looked up before gulping softly. “Not counting...Changbin’s.” Chan gasped softly before laughing nervously. “Felix..you have five hickies from Jeongin..” Felix nodded proudly before snuggling into Jeongin’s embrace, his lips pressing against his lips with a huge grin. Chan ran his hands through his hair with a nervous chuckle. “It was under his collar...he pulled his shirt down..please tell me you didn’t take your shirt  _ off.. _ !” Felix turned to look at his brother before rolling his eyes with a small smile. “No! I just pulled my collar down so he could mark somewhere that you wouldn’t see..how did you know?” His voice drifted before looking over at the snickering couple on the couch. “You guys! Why won’t you let me have anything to myself..why did you have to snitch on me to Chan!” 

Chan sighed deeply before grabbing food from the kitchen, “Jeongin are you staying the night?” Jeongin smiled before intertwining his fingers with Felix’s. “Sure, if you’re allowing me.” Chan hummed before starting to make dinner for everyone. Felix giggled softly before pulling the younger to the couch as he grabbed two controllers, “Loser has to sleep on the floor since Chan activated his big brother mode.” Jeongin nudged the other as they giggled to each other, Minho watched the tv before getting up with a hum. “Chan we’re heading out, we fixed your brother’s relationship and that’s all we really had planned for today. See ya tomorrow!” Chan waved them out before continuing to cook, the only sounds being the two playing games in the background along with his knife hitting the cutting board as he chopped the food. “Felix I personally hope you lose and sleep on the floor. I don’t mind you two sleeping together, I know you’re too innocent for sex.” 

Felix shrieked at the word as he watched his screen flash red before turning to his brother. “You messed me up!” Jeongin snickered before turning to look at Felix, “looks like you get the floor babe.” Felix whined before getting up to grab blankets from the closet. “Here, let’s make me a little fort.” Jeongin nodded before moving to Felix’s room. Felix flopped on his bed before hugging his pillow with a soft sigh, “I’ll miss you..make sure you’re super soft for Jeonginie tonight.” Jeongin chuckled before moving the blanket to the floor, his body moving to lay by Felix. “You know I can sleep on the floor, this is your room.” Felix shook his head quickly as he took one of his decorative pillows and tossed it onto the blankets on the floor. “You won, I’m fine with sleeping on the floor.”

“I won cuz Chan distracted you, you were beating me. I’ll sleep on the floor.” Felix frowned before pushing Jeongin down on the bed before sitting on his stomach. “You’re sleeping here.” Chan hummed before walking in with a soft groan. “Felix what-” Felix jumped, his cheeks a dark red as he looked at his brother with an embarrassed look. “It’s not what it looks like--” He hugged a pillow to his chest as his big eyes stared at his big brother. Chan perked his eyebrow up before smirking, “Felix I thought you were more of a bottom not gonna lie.” Felix’s ears burned as his blush spread across his face. “What!? I said it wasn’t like that! Jeongin tell him that it wasn’t like that!” Jeongin sat up from his position where Felix had pinned him down with the same smirk. “Felix wouldn’t be able to go through with it anyways, he does give off mega bottom vibes.” 

Felix’s jaw dropped before he tossed a pillow at his brother. “I can top if I wanted to!” His face was a dark red as he glared at the two males staring at him with the biggest of grins painted on their faces. “I can…” Jeongin smiled before moving to gently peck Felix’s cheek, his lips moving down to his neck with a smirk. Felix’s head instantly moved back as his eyes fluttered shut. Chan cleared his throat as he watched his brother melt into submission in front of his very eyes. Felix lifted his head with a soft hum, his cheeks puffing up before he looked away from his brother’s gaze. “Bottom.” Jeongin’s voice a soft whisper into Felix’s ear as the two smiled at each other with small giggles.

“Come on kids, dinner is ready and I don’t think I can handle any more of your PDA.” Jeongin chuckled softly before pulling the redhead’s body up. Felix rubbed his neck gently before glancing over at his collarbone in the mirror with a shy grin. Jeongin stopped to watch the other stare into the mirror before wrapping his arms around Felix’s waist. “You’re mine.” Felix leaned back against the younger, his face turning to look at him before humming softly. “We should go eat dinner.” 

“Hold on, let me admire you first..” Felix turned to face Jeongin, the younger’s hands pushing Felix’s shirt past his collarbone. His eyes scanning the tan skin scattered with little dark marks, his finger dragging along each one before their lips met for a long kiss. Chan poked his head back into the room before groaning softly. “Just eat here then.” He left before coming back in with two plates, his hand placing them down on the desk before shaking his head. “Lovebirds..” Felix smiled brightly as he moved to hug his brother tightly. “You’re the best brother ever! Love you!” 

He grabbed his blanket before wrapping it around the two males. “Careful not to spill on my bed okay?” Jeongin nodded before placing their plates on their laps, his phone laid in front of them as they watched a movie together. Their heads pressed against each other as they quietly ate together. Chan smiled as he started to walk out of the room, “And remember Lixie, I know you’re way too innocent for anything past kissing. You can sleep in your bed, no one has to sleep on the floor.” Felix coughed softly, his hand covering his mouth as he tried to catch his breath. “Hey babe..don’t choke.” Jeongin chuckled softly as he rubbed the other’s back with a worried look. “I’m okay, whenever he brings it up I just get nervous. He’s not wrong but I dunno..” Jeongin hummed before moving their empty plates onto his desk as he turned to look at the elder. 

“So you’re just not ready for something like that. That’s fine babe.” His hands moved to cup Felix’s cheeks with soft coos. “I don’t ever want you to take that step before you are. It’s something really important okay? Don’t let someone take that from you before you’re ready. I may be super mature for my age but I will wait forever for you.” Felix smiled shyly before looking away for a bit, his eyes softening as he thought of what Jeongin had said. “Do you think it’ll take me forever?” The younger hummed with a shrug as his hands moved from Felix’s face. “I dunno, but either way..If it’s me who shares that with you or not, I want you to be sure you’re ready.”

“Do you think it won’t be with you? What do you mean..” Jeongin’s tongue slid along his lips before they pursed together gently. “I mean..if we break up. Things happen you know?” Felix’s eyes widened causing Jeongin to pull his body close to his own. “Hey...baby I didn’t mean to worry you. I like you way too much to break up with you anytime soon.” Felix smiled nervously before puckering his lips with a soft whine. “Oh Lixie..” Jeongin smiled as their lips locked pasionatly, his fingers tangling into the strands of his orange hair. 

Once their lips parted Felix smiled with a soft giggle. “I like you a lot too Innie..Like a lot a lot. I noticed when we first kissed.” Jeongin chuckled before picking up their plates as he sat up from the bed. “You’re cute Felix.” The two walked out of the room to wash their dishes with huge grins plastered on their faces, Felix’s body wrapped around Jeongin’s arm as they walked with minimal space between their bodies. Chan looked up from his spot on the couch with a small laugh. “Felix you might suffocate him if you keep clinging on to him so much. Give the man some space kiddo.” Felix shot a dark look at his brother before nuzzling his head into the crook of Jeongin’s neck with a soft hum of satisfaction. “Chan don’t worry, I think it’s cute when he’s like this.” Once he washed their dishes he moved to wrap his arms around Felix’s waist. “Come on, let’s go finish that movie okay?”

The two moved back to the room leaving Chan to sit with himself again, his head tilting over the top of the couch with a soft sigh. “If Jeongin forgave Felix this time but he was pissed for a whole week how will he feel when he finds out that Changbin is Felix’s soulmate..”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the one where changlix AND jeonglix kinda gay haha

Felix sat on the pile of the blankets that he had on his floor, Jeongin sitting on his bed with a slight pout. “Felix you know I don’t mind sleeping on the floor, this is  _ your  _ bed after all.” Felix looked up, his cheeks puffed up as he shoved popcorn into his mouth. “Huh? No no, I lost. That was the deal.” Jeongin sighed before laying back into the various pillows laid along the bed frame. “And you’re sure you have enough pillows and blankets?” His lips curled into a small smile as he heard Felix groan from the floor, “Will you feel better if I let you give me more?” 

There was no verbal answer, Felix was only met with a few pillows and a blanket tossed down from his bed. He moved them to where he felt comfortable, his eyes drooping and before he knew it he was passed out in the middle of the movie. Jeongin didn’t even notice until he heard soft snores from the other side of the room, he looked over before cooing softly at the sight of the elder laying in a huge pile of blankets. His hair sprawled along his face as he lazily laid along the pillow fort. “He’s so pretty…” He hummed as he stared at him for a moment before turning the tv off along with the lamp next to Felix’s bed. 

His body laid in the bed for a while before sitting up as he sighed. It felt empty..He turned to look over at Felix again, his body moving to lay next to the other without a second thought. He wrapped his arms around Felix’s waist as he brought his back to his own chest. He rested his head onto the elder’s shoulder as he took a deep breath. His scent engulfing the younger as he slowly exhaled. They stayed like that all the way into the morning, Chan opening the door to peek in only to smile fondly. “God..they’re so adorable. It’s a shame the world didn’t pair you up with Felix, Jeongin..” 

* * *

Felix sat on the living room couch, his feet propped onto the coffee table as he had a bag of chips resting along his thigh and his eyes staring at the tv. His fingers fidgeting with a controller as he played some game Chan didn’t bother learning the name of, it was always the same routine with him. He would have a day off and then spend all of his free time playing a video game instead of actually hanging out with people. Chan tried getting him to go out but each time he got a grunt in response. Until this time.

“Lix, Changbin is coming over in like ten minutes.” Felix hummed in response as he continued to play his game without a second thought about what his brother was saying. “But I won’t be able to hang out with him since I’m kinda busy with work so I thought you could break the news to him and spend time with him. You two seem like you’re becoming friends, alright thanks Felix!” Before he could get an answer he slipped out the door as his little brother paused his game with a look of utter shock. He sighed as he started to play again before looking up when Changbin walked in, his eyes moving around the room before stopping on the younger. “Where’s Chan?”

“He ditched you for work I guess. You’re stuck with me or you can go back home, either way is fine I don’t care.” Changbin hummed as he leaned over the back of the couch to grab a handful of chips. “Isn’t it your day off? Why don’t we go do something productive instead of you just playing games all day and eating chips. Let’s go get a real meal and do something productive.” Felix’s eyes rolled before turning off the game as he turned to look at the other. “What do you have in mind then?”

Changbin’s lips curled into a smile as he pulled the younger off the couch, “Secret.” Felix sighed as he shoved his feet into shoes before his body was yanked out of the house. Felix asked countless of questions but Changbin refused to answer any of them, his hand grasping Felix’s as he dragged the younger around town. They eventually stopped in front of an art studio, Changbin’s lips perking up into a smile.

“Gowon originally wanted to do pottery with me but she got caught up with an old friend, I kinda think it’s cool. Wanna do it?” Felix could feel his heart drop in his chest, it was nice that Changbin thought of him but was he just a backup plan? A second choice. Changbin moved to stand in front of Felix as he tilted his head, “Felix?” Felix blinked before laughing nervously, his hand moving to rub the back of his neck.

“Sorry I spaced out a bit. Sounds good to me, I’ve never made anything like that but I guess I can try.” Changbin smiled before tugging the younger inside the building. He walked into one of the corners where a few pottery wheels were placed. “Changbin I have no idea how to use this.” Changbin chuckled as he sat at one of the wheels before patting the seat next to him. “I’ll show you.” 

Changbin rolled his sleeves up as he grabbed a glob of clay, his hands smacking it before dipping into some water placed in a clear bucket next to him. His foot gently pressed against the pedal as the wheel started. “And then..you center it like this..” His voice was soft as he worked with the clay, his hands dipping back into the water every so often. “And once you have it centered, you push down in the middle then you pull it kinda..putting your thumb here and the rest of your fingers in the inside as you squeeze. Making sure you slow the wheel down while doing so or it’ll just become a huge mess and you’ll have to start over again.” His hands moved to grab some other tools as he focused on what he was making, his voice no longer telling Felix what he was doing as he worked silently. He ended up making a bowl shape as he grabbed wires and slowly cut the space under it. 

He lifted up the bowl as he smiled, his eyes finally meeting Felix’s. “Not too hard right?” Felix blinked before craning his next to the side with a slight frown. “Sure..” Changbin hummed as he pulled Felix’s body down to sit him on the same chair as him, his arms wrapping around Felix’s waist as he grabbed another glob of clay. His chin rested on Felix’s shoulder as he spoke to the other softly. “What should we make?” Felix hummed before turning his head slightly to look at Changbin’s focused face as he turned the wheel on again. 

“You made a bowl but it seemed way too easy, what’s the hardest thing you’ve made?” Changbin thought for a moment as he dipped his fingers in the water, “A vase.” Felix smiled as he leaned against the elder, “Let’s make that then.” Changbin chuckled as he started to make the shape, his tongue sliding along his lips as he furrowed his eyebrows. Felix gasped when he felt his hands being grabbed as Changbin grabbed his hands. “I wanted to make it with you, remember Felix? Just let me guide you.” 

Felix swallowed as their hands intertwined, the vase slowly being made as their bodies pressed together. Changbin slowly cut under it before smiling widely. “Damn..looks awesome. Now it goes into the kiln and we can come back for it, let’s go eat and get it later.” Felix nodded as he sat still, his body not knowing whether to move from Changbin’s grasp or not. Changbin wiped his hands on the towel before patting Felix’s back. “What do you want to eat?” Felix got up as he shrugged, his hands sliding into his pockets. “I don’t know, you said real food but I kinda want ramen.” Changbin chuckled as he shook his head slowly, “That’s fine. I know a place.” The two walked to the restaurant, Changbin running his hand through his hair as he leaned against the hostess stand. “Can we get a table for two?” The girl smiled as she took the boys to the table before placing the menus down. 

Changbin sat down, his eyes staring at the menu quietly. His hand flipping through it as he rested his cheek in his palm. “Hey binnie, how about this? It’s cheaper that way.” Changbin moved his eyes to look at what Felix has pointed to before smiling, “A huge bowl to share?” Felix nodded as he looked up at the waitress who now stood next to their table. “We’ll have the big bowl to share and then I’ll have a chocolate milkshake too. Changbin?” Changbin looked over at the girl with a small smile, “I’ll just have water. This is on one bill.” Felix frowned before leaning over the table to meet eye contact of the waitress, “And it’s mine! Don’t let this dude pay.” The girl chuckled before turning away leaving Changbin staring at Felix dumbfounded. 

“You taught me pottery, at least let me pay for our lunch.” Changbin sighed as his head shook with a smile spreading along his lips. “Chan was right, you are so annoying.” Felix looked away with a pained expression before glancing over at the other as he continued. “It’s adorable, you’re so childish and yet..at times mature for your age. How can someone truly figure you out?” Felix blinked in shock before shrugging, his eyes moving to the table. “You call me annoying but you made a big deal out of me paying for lunch when I have a whole ass job, what else am I supposed to do with this money?”

Changbin hummed as he quirked up an eyebrow, “I suppose you’re right. I guess I can let you pay this time, but next time I won’t let you go so easily.” Felix hummed as he rolled back his shoulders, his back straightening as he confidently smiled. “Fine.” Changbin chuckled, the two talking for a bit before their food was brought to their table, Felix practically squealing at the large milkshake placed down as well. “Whipped cream and a fancy bendy straw~ I knew this place wouldn’t let me down.” Changbin’s eyes moved to look up at the other before crinkling as he smiled. “You’re cute.” 

Felix’s cheeks dusted a light pink as he sipped his drink with a nervous smile, “You can’t just say that so nonchalantly.” The other hummed as he grabbed utensils as he started to eat his side of the bowl. Felix puffed his cheeks out before letting out a long sigh, was he just overthinking things? Changbin had a girlfriend, there’s no way anything they’ve done together today counted as anything. Changbin probably saw him as some younger brother or some kid he had to take care of when Chan couldn’t. It’s how most people viewed him, he should be used to it by now. What made this so different? Why did it get under his skin so much?

His face must’ve shown his deep thought since the silence broke between them as the elder spoke. “What’s on your mind?” Felix looked up smiling, his hand putting ramen to his lips before shoving it into his mouth. Perhaps it was to avoid talking or maybe he just didn’t have much of an answer to the question. Changbin gave up on it as he grabbed a few noodles, he slurped a few before stopping once he felt one of them getting pulled from him. He glanced up only to meet eye contact with a shocked Felix, a noodle hanging from each of their lips for a split second before the younger broke it with his teeth. He cleared his throat, “I didn’t think this through as much as I probably should have when we ordered this.” Changbin chuckled at how soft the younger’s voice was compared to his normal energetic tone.

“It happens, besides it’s not like we didn’t notice and kept going. No Lady and the Tramp moment here.” Felix smiled at the comment, his cheek squished into his palm as his eyes moved to look out the window. “That would end pretty horridly, considering we both are in a relationship.” The two went silent again only to talk briefly between each of their bites, once they were finished Felix paid with a smirk as he watched Changbin play with his wallet. “So do you think our vase is done?” 

“Probably, let’s go check.” The two got up, Felix leading the way out as they walked back to the art store. Changbin peeked over the counter with a glance towards the pottery area, their creations placed on a table with their names by it. Felix looked over Changbin’s shoulder before smiling widely, his hands clapping softly together in excitement before he moved to grab the vase. “It turned out pretty cool, your bowl too but not going to lie it’s simple.” The elder rolled his eyes before picking up his bowl, “You can keep the vase then. I’ll take the bowl.” Felix’s eyes sparkled as he held the vase close to his chest. “I’ll treasure it.” 

The two part ways after that, Felix holding the vase carefully as he walked into the house. His brother sitting at the table with his phone in hand along with a fork as he ate his lunch. “Hey Channie look!” Felix moved to stand next to the other as his arms stretched out to show him what he had made. “I made it with Changbin, I think I’m going to paint it later too..” Chan looked up from his phone only to coo softly. “Felix that’s cool, I’ll pick up some flowers tomorrow so you can put something in it.” Felix nodded, his body joyfully skipping to his room. He carefully placed the vase down on his desk before flopping his body onto his bed.

His hands grabbed his phone from his pocket, his fingers scrolling through his contacts before stopping on Jeongin’s to facetime him. Once Jeongin’s face appeared on his phone he smiled shyly. “Hey innie~” He smiled at his camera as the younger waved as he greeted him back. “Hey lix, what were you up to today?” 

“I hung out with Changbin.” 

Jeongin frowned slightly before shifting in his bed as he sighed softly. “Yeah?” Felix nodded as he moved to grab the vase from his desk, his grin huge as he looked at the camera again. “Yeah! Look what we made together.” Jeongin looked at the vase, his lips tugging into a small pout as he stared at his boyfriend on his phone screen. Felix must’ve noticed his facial expression since his smile dropped instantly. “What’s wrong?” his head tilted as he picked up his phone again to look into his camera.

“I just wanted to hang out with you today but Chan said you were busy..with Changbin I see now.” Felix frowned before bringing his phone to his lips. He moved back with a small smile before kissing his camera again, “We can hang out now then? I miss you..” Jeongin looked over at his clock before smiling back as he looked at the elder. “Sure, wanna come to my house? My parents are gone.”

Felix chuckled softly before ending the call, his hands grabbing his jacket as he made his way out of his room. Chan poked his head out of his room when his brother knocked on his door, his eyes moving to Felix’s outfit before chuckling. “Going out again? Will I ever see you today?” Felix smiled as he hugged his brother’s arm tightly. “Can you drive me to Jeonginie’s?” He looked up at the elder with puppy eyes as he sighed deeply.

“Are you going to spend the night there?” 

“I dunno, maybe. Can I? I wanna. I miss him.” Chan smiled as he ran his fingers through his brother’s orange hair. “Fine, you can stay over if his parents agree.” Felix smiled nervously before nodding quickly, “Yup! I already asked!” He pulled his brother to the car before pushing him to the driver seat. Chan drove him to the house before looking over at Felix. “Don’t bother his parents too much, call me when you want me to pick you up.” Chan leaned over to kiss Felix’s forehead with a smile. “Now go hang out with your boyfriend.”

Felix jumped out of the car as he rushed to the door, his hand knocked on the door until Jeongin appeared with a smile. Chan moved his head to watch his brother hop into the younger’s arms, their lips locking as Jeongin’s hand closed the door behind them. Felix wrapped his arms around his boyfriend as their lips slowly parted. “I’m sorry I seemed too busy with Changbin to hang out with you..I’m all yours tonight.” Jeongin smiled as he snaked his arms around the other’s waist, “Do you want to watch a movie then? We can make some popcorn, maybe have some pizza and ice cream?” Felix nodded, his lips pecking along Jeongin’s face. “And we can cuddle?” Jeongin smiled as he took Felix’s face before connecting their lips for a long kiss, Felix practically melting in the embrace.

Jeongin smiled as he rubbed their noses together, “Lets go order some pizza baby.” Felix nodded slowly as he nuzzled his head under the younger’s chin. Jeongin had a hand pressed into the small of Felix’s back as the other held his phone to his ear. He ordered the pizza as he pressed his lips to Felix’s ear, the elder shivering as Jeongin’s words hit his ear. His lip curled up as his body shriveled up against the other. Once Jeongin hung up he pulled Felix onto the couch, his hand resting between Felix’s legs as he grabbed his thigh. Felix sat still with a grin, his head resting along Jeongin’s shoulder as he watched the movie play out.

The night flashed before Felix’s eyes, the two sprawled out on the couch as Felix slowly woke up with a yawn. He ran his fingers through Jeongin’s hair as he hummed softly as the other opened his eyes slowly. “Hey baby..” His voice was soft as he stared up at the elder hovering over him. Felix smiled as he leaned down to peck Jeongin’s lips before getting up, Jeongin sitting up as he watched Felix move to the door. “Hey..hey. Are you leaving so soon?” Felix looked over before smiling, his hand opening the door as he leaned against it. “Yeah I have to go home babe, I’m going on a hike with Chan. He’s complaining that we never have brother time anymore.” Jeongin whined before getting up to kiss Felix quickly, “Okay fine, I’ll miss you. Call me afterwards again okay?” Felix nodded as he left the house, his body sliding into Chan’s car with a hum. “Okay lemme shower first then we can go hiking!” 

Chan smiled as he backed the car up, his eyes moving to Felix as he started to drive. “By the way, Changbin is going to join us.” Felix looked over at his brother before giving him a thumbs up. “Is gowon dead or something?” Chan gasped softly before his hand smacked Felix’s leg with a frown. “No, god no. Felix don’t say that! Changbin just wants to hang out with guys, he says he can’t stand her friends.” Felix nodded as he looked out the window as they drove. Chan parked the car before patting Felix’s leg, “Take a shower before Changbin comes over. I also advise you blow dry your hair so you don’t get sick.” Felix hummed in response as he moved to the bathroom. He took a quick shower, his hands running through his wet hair as he walked out of the bathroom. Changbin looked up from the couch before took a deep breath in as the younger pushed his hair back with a hum.

Their eyes met shortly before Felix tensed for a moment, “Oh shit you’re already here. Hold on I’ll dry my hair.” He moved back to the bathroom, his hand running through his hair as he blow dried it with a hum. Changbin watched his fingers run through the orange strands as they started to dry, his tongue sliding along his lips before looking away with a sigh. Felix came out with a small smile, “Ready!” He adjusted his backpack before looking at the two males on the couch. Chan got up before moving his brother’s hair to kiss his forehead with a soft coo. 

“Ew stop stop stop!” Felix screeched as he squirmed to get out of Chan’s grasp but the elder had him in a tight hug. “I love you Felix.” Felix groaned as he pushed his brother’s face away with a frown, “That’s terrific now back off!” Chan smiled before ruffling the other’s hair, “You know I love you, so you won’t be super sad when I say I can’t make it to the hiking trip.” Felix scoffed before shifting his weight, “I left my boyfriend to go hiking with  _ my brother _ who is canceling on me?” Chan sighed before cupping Felix’s cheeks before resting their foreheads together. “Come on lix..something came up, Changbin can still go with you.” The younger rolled his eyes slowly before his end ended onto Changbin, “Well...okay yeah. Whatever, you suck Chan.” Changbin chuckled softly before grabbing his car keys, “We don’t need him Felix, he’d only slow us down.” Felix grinned before sticking his tongue out at his brother as they walked out. “Chan is a slow bitch!”

Chan frowned before narrowing his eyes, “Watch your mouth.” Felix swallowed hard before saluting his brother with a nervous grin. “Yes sir. Love you sir. Don’t hurt me sir.” Chan rolled his eyes before pushing his brother out of the house, “Don’t die, have fun!” He closed the door in Felix’s face before Felix could say anything else. 

“Wonder what has him so busy nowadays..never has time for me.” Changbin frowned slightly before pulling Felix into a hug as he gently pecked his cheek. “Hey..he loves you a lot don’t worry. He would’ve come if he had the time.” Felix frowned as his eyes looked up at the other with a frown. “He never has time for me anymore..” 

Changbin squished Felix’s cheeks as he frowned, his fingers squishing the younger’s face. “Hey. Don’t frown like that, show me that pretty smile.” Felix whined as he tried to smile as Changbin squished his cheeks with a soft chuckle. “Come on, let's go hiking.” Felix nodded with a smile before they started to get into the car, Changbin hummed as he drove to the campground with a long path. They started the hike as Felix kicked a rock down the path with a smile before turning to look at Changbin. The other looking up at the sky as he walked slowly next to Felix, his lips curled into a small smile as his eyes shined in the sunlight. Felix looked back at the rock, his foot moving to kick it but instead ended up skidding over it as he lost his balance. His eyes opened wide as he fell straight on his back with a groan, Changbin kneeling next to him in an instant. “Felix are you okay?!” He pulled the younger to sit up as he studied his body for any injuries.

Felix’s lip trembled before small tears fell down his face, Changbin wiping them slowly as he sighed softly. “It’s okay to say it hurts Felix. You fell on pretty hard ground. Did you hit your head?” He gently moved the younger’s head to rest against his chest as he slowly ran his fingers through his hair. “I’m not seeing any blood..” Felix sniffled as he wipes his eyes with a small pout, “It’s my ankle that hurts, I think I sprained it..”

“Can you walk?” Changbin gently pulled Felix’s body up before having Felix wince as he tried to put his weight on it. “It’s okay Lix..here, get on my back.” Felix paused for a moment before crawling onto Changbin’s back, his head burying itself in his neck as his arms wrapped around it. Changbin gripped onto Felix’s thighs as he started to walk back to the car, “You know Felix..even though you got hurt and I have to carry you to the car, I think this was the most relaxed I’ve been in awhile.” Felix lifted his head before speaking up softly. “Are you stressed a lot with Gowon?”

Changbin sighed heavily as he glanced over at the younger, “Don’t get me wrong I love her but..something tells me she’s just not right. She’s not my soulmate or anything but I thought that when I could see color I would just ignore it, my soulmate didn’t matter to me as long as I had her.” Felix tilted his head as he thought about what Changbin was saying. “But you know Felix..I want to know who my soulmate is, what if I feel more comfortable and at ease with them? I’m scared that Gowon can’t give me what I need anymore..I don’t want to leave her but if there’s someone out there waiting for me and I’m ignoring them. How will they feel?”

Felix rested his head against Changbin’s before speaking up, “I think they’d probably miss you more if they knew you. If they knew you were out of reach.” Changbin sighed as he unlocked his car and set Felix into the passenger seat. “You sound like you’re speaking from experience.” Felix shook his head as he shrugged, “My first ever boyfriend and crush was Jeongin. I have him so I can’t say I know how it feels to like someone out of reach.” Changbin smiled before sliding into his side of the car, “What if I already know my soulmate? Do you ever think of that? Like how crazy that would be..”

“If they already knew you weren’t attainable?” 

“Yeah..” Changbin looked over at Felix before furrowing his eyebrows at the look on the other’s face. It almost looked upset in a way. He couldn’t tell if it was about the conversation or from his ankle.

“That would probably be the single most horrendous pain a heart could take.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the one that's lowkey a filler but also an intro to some drama so get your popcorn

It had been a few weeks after the two had had their soulmate conversation, Felix had been spending more and more time with Changbin despite Jeongin’s whines and complaints. Chan had watched his brother inch away further from his boyfriend as he had taken endless days off to hang out with Changbin. He never knew how to bring it up to him though so he just watched it ravel out. Eventually he spoke up, all their friends sitting around the cafe’s table as usual.

“Now how about this guys, just a random idea that comes to mind. What are the odds we go on a huge friend-cation and all go on a camping trip this weekend?” Chan smiled as he looked around at the group, his eyes stopping on his little brother as he tried to read his expression. 

Felix sat in his seat, his body leaning against his boyfriend’s as he thought about how it would play out. He turned his body to look at the other, Jeongin’s eyes already locked into his. “What do you think Lixie?” His lips pulling into a grin as he watched Felix’s nose scrunch up. 

“What’s that look for babe?” Jeongin chuckled softly, his hand running along Felix’s arms. Felix opened his mouth to reply but Jisung’s voice cut in before he could say anything. “Yes! Yes yes yes! Friend-cation! Camping trip! We’re in! No ifs ands or buts!” 

Minho blinked as his boyfriend hopped up and down on his lap, his voice ringing through his ears. Changbin sipped his coffee as he tried to keep his cool,  _ Jisung’s voice seems extra annoying today.  _ Changbin chuckles at his thoughts before looking around the table. All eyes were on him as if they were waiting for his response. 

“Oh sorry, sure I’ll go. Can I bring a plus one?” 

Chan gave him a thumbs up with a huge toothy grin. “Everyone’s in! I’ll set up a reservation for this weekend. Text you guys the details tonight.” Everyone nodded as they went back to their conversations and coffee.

Jeongin rested his lips on top of Felix’s head as he spoke softly to the other, “What’s on your mind? You know, before Jisung decided to open his huge mouth as usual.” There was a soft giggle from Felix before he looked up at his boyfriend to reply. “I was just thinking about how gross it is outdoors and how uncomfy it is sleeping on the ground.” Jeongin scoffed as he laughed at the faces Felix was making.

“It’s not all that bad, come on lix. We’ll get to be in a tent together and we can snuggle to keep warm and everything. Doesn’t that sound amazing?” Felix hummed as he pulled Jeongin’s arm around his chest. His eyes closes as he played with the younger’s fingers, it wouldn’t be too bad would it? Spending the weekend with all his friends and then ending the nights cuddled up to Jeongin. It doesn’t sound all that bad if you ignore the possible bugs and uncomfy ground. 

  
  


Chan watches Felix scurry around the house as he shoves things into a backpack before furrowing his eyebrows to think. “Don’t think too hard kiddo.” 

Felix looked up from his phone before humming as he zipped up his bag. “I think I have everything. But like, explain this more to me. The sleeping arrangements and what we’re eating.” Chan sighed as he wrapped his arm around Felix’s shoulders. “We’ll be in a tent along with Jeongin. Minho and Jisung in one and then Changbin and whoever his plus one is.” 

“Go won. His girlfriend.” His voice seemed a bit cold, his eyes widened upon hearing his voice tone before he turned to look back at his older brother. “That sounded weirdly rude, maybe I’m just on edge with sleeping outside of my comfort zone with everyone, you know?”

“It’s legit a camping trip Felix, you did it all the time as a kid.” Felix scrunched his nose up before humming softly. “Well yeah, but I didn’t have anxiety then.” The elder hummed in response as his hand rubbed his arms, his eyes moving to look out the window to see the other cars rolling up in the driveway. “I’ll be there for you the whole time. Jeongin too, and even Changbin since he seems to do really well with you and your anxiety right?”

“Yeah..” Felix’s voice drifted away. His eyes noticed the cars as his lips perked into a quick grin. Jeongin’s body got out of his car with a wave to whoever was driving it. Felix ran out the house, his legs quickly wrapping around his boyfriend’s waist as he hopped into his arms.

“Hey Jeongin! I can’t wait to snuggle under the stars with you~” Chan arched an eyebrow up as he watched the drastic change in his brother’s attitude. He stifled a laugh as he picked up his bags along with Felix’s. He stuffed the two bags into the car as he turned to watch the other cars roll in with smiles. 

Once all of them were there they all packed into Chan’s car, the whole car filled with a mixture of voices singing along to the radio. Somehow Felix ended up falling asleep against Jeongin’s shoulder amongst the loud screams of Jisung and Minho. Chan glanced over at him every once in a while before pulling into the campground, his hand turning off the radio to turn towards the back seat.

“Alright guys, we’re here. Wake up Felix..” The elder leaned from his chair to rub Felix’s shoulder as the rest of the guys walked out of the car. Felix slid out of the car with a sigh, his hand rubbing his eyes before swatting away the bugs. Jeongin giggled to himself, his hand grabbing things from his backpack. He offered his bug spray with a smile as he watched Felix take it and spray a bunch on. Jeongin snorted, his hand grasping onto his boyfriend’s to stop him from dousing himself in it. 

“Calm down Lix, you’ll have trouble breathing if you keep going. Bug spray doesn’t smell stellar and trust me--” Jeongin turned to the side as he gagged at the overpowering scent of his spray. “Just take a whiff.”

Felix shuddered as he turned to face away from the area around him, “At least I won’t be eaten up…?” His voice was unsure as his smile faded slightly as his shoulders sagged. “I won’t complain anymore. Let’s try to have the best time this weekend! Bugs or not.” He nodded at the rest of the group who seemed to be having trouble containing their laughter. 

Chan had set up the fire alongside with Minho helping sort of, he was actually just tossing sticks in. Jisung had been talking to Jeongin while setting up the tents while Felix stood watching. He felt like he should be doing something but everyone had a partner in what they were doing. Even Gowon had been doing something with Changbin, not like Felix didn’t believe she could do it but it surprised him that a  _ girl  _ would be so active in setting up camp. 

Felix shuffled his way towards the tent area with a pout as they seemed almost finished. Jeongin must’ve noticed his expression since he dropped the tent stakes he was holding and offered the other a hand. “Wanna help? You can hold the stakes while I put them into the ground okay? Then we can set up the big one that we’ll be sleeping in with Chan.” 

Jisung let out such a huge sigh of relief as he finished setting up his side of the tent, “Thank the lords in heaven I don’t have to set up that one. Bro she’s  _ huge.  _ Goodluck.” Felix nodded with a slight frown as he watched Jisung walk towards the fire and plop himself onto Minho’s lap. 

“Shall we get started then? While you were talking I just ended up finishing this one.” Felix nodded, his eyes scanning the ground to find the bag of tents. His hand grabbed the only one left before turning to his boyfriend.

“Where are we setting it up? Since it's big and all.” Jeongin motioned vaguely in an area towards the field where the first tent ended. Felix made his way over, his hands passing the bag from hand to hand as he stood idle waiting for Jeongin to join him in the area. 

Felix looked over at the rest of the people, his eyes catching Jeongin talking to Jisung. He was most likely asking for directions though knowing Jisung they’ve probably gone off track with their conversation and he’ll be there for a while. He sighed as he squatted down to the level of the bag to look inside of it, it didn’t look all that hard. It just had a lot of parts to assemble. Felix sat on the ground as he started piecing things together, he didn’t even notice Changbin had sat down next to him to assemble things as well. 

He only noticed when their hands brushed along each other when they went to grab the same thing. Felix’s eyes shot up, his face going red though with the heat it probably wasn’t all that noticeable. Changbin chuckled as he took his hand away, instead offering it to help the younger up from their spot on the ground.

“So, looks like we’ll be working together to put this bad boy up huh Felix?” Changbin’s voice cut through the awkward silence that hung in the air for a moment. “Yeah suppose so.” They set up the tent in almost silence aside from some grunts from Changbin. Felix wanted to complain through the whole thing but he felt like Changbin wouldn’t have taken it well. Chan for sure would be nodding and half listening and Jeongin would probably reason with his complaints but he had no idea how Changbin would react. He kept his mouth shut. Just for his own safety.

After they were done they all huddled up by the fire for dinner. The sky was starting to darken and the sun was making its way further down as it made its way behind the treetops. Felix sat on the ground as his back leaned along the log. It wasn’t the most pleasant feeling, in fact it made his back ache terribly but he already told the group he wouldn’t complain much. The fire glowed up their faces as they sat in a circle talking amongst each other. Chan had been setting up a cooking grate over the flames carefully as if he’d melt if a single flame would touch him. 

Felix glanced around the circle, Minho and Jisung had been under a blanket on the ground a little ways off from where he was. Gowon had been sitting on a log and Changbin was leaning against the log next to her, her fingers absentmindedly going through his hair. He needed a haircut soon, his hair was never usually that long. Though Felix didn’t know why it mattered all that much, or why he noticed tiny things like that about Changbin. When it was him who needed the haircut Chan would have to nag him about it before it would get done.

Chan hummed as he pulled the food off with a triumphant look in his eyes, “Alright guys, grab a plate and take what you want. I can serve myself last since I packed snacks. If there’s not much for me I’ll live, don’t stress. Take what you want.” Everyone followed directions easily enough and once it got to Felix he hummed softly, there was just enough for him and maybe a bit extra for Chan. 

He felt bad even when Chan told him not to worry about it. It was his brother of all people, he felt bad about taking some food that Chan could easily have as well. He took half of it before looking at his brother expectantly. “Here you can have the rest of it.” Chan looked at the rest then back at his little brother’s serving. “Felix you can have more if you want you know, I’m fine.”

When Felix didn’t budge, Chan sighed as he scooped the rest onto his own plate with a slight smile. “Leave it to Felix to never want anyone to go just a tad bit hungry.” Felix smiled as he ate his serving with a proud smirk on his face, maybe this trip wouldn’t be  _ so  _ bad. 

One they all finished their dinners and watched the sun set for a bit longer Chan seemed to have  _ more  _ things to feed the group over the fire. Felix tried to look over his shoulder to peek at what they’d be eating but his brother was rather good at hiding things from him. He gave up after a bit, his body nesting into Jeongin’s again. His hand pulled the blanket over their bodies to warm them up a bit more. Despite the fire being lit the air seemed a bit chilly as the breeze ran through the campground. 

“And...I present to you. A camp favorite! S’mores!” Chan’s voice boomed through the silence as his face lit up with a childish grin. 

“Aren’t we a bit old for that?” Minho commented before getting his stomach jabbed by Jisung’s elbow as the younger spoke up. “No shut up you’re just a hag.” Minho scoffed as he pushed his boyfriend away only to grab him close again when he shivered a bit. His body missing the warmth Jisung was giving off. Chan chuckled as he passed out the marshmallows to everyone along with the other components of s’mores. 

Changbin leaned forward as he completely submerged in the flames with a small smirk to his lips as he brought it out. The marshmallow caught on fire as he watched it practically burn on the stick. Minho watched him dumbfounded, he shook his head as he leaned over slightly, his arm reached out over the fire as the marshmallow barely touched the fire.

Felix seemed to have the same idea, his eyes on the prize as he focused almost  _ too  _ deeply. “You see Changbin, you must use focus to master the art of the mallow.” Jisung almost choked on his laughter, his marshmallow going straight into the fire on accident as he laughed so hard. Minho gave him a side glance with a grimace, his hand taking the stick from his hand. “Jisung come  _ on. _ You’ve burnt yours to a crisp now just like Changbin.”

Jisung shrugged as he slowly caught his breath, his hand wiping at his tears with a soft giggle. “Why do you guys take it so seriously? It’s a marshmallow.” He grabbed his stick back as he offered it to Chan as the elder put it together into a s’more then handed it back. Jisung hummed happily with Changbin as the two watched the rest of the others heat their own. 

Felix was practically  _ squatting  _ to get the best angle for his marshmallow. Even after everyone was done he was turning his stick with utter concentration. “It has to be a perfect golden brown. It’s worth nothing if I mess it up.” Jisung blinked in shock as he watched Felix work on his after he had long finished his own. Felix lifted his stick with a proud smile, his feet moving to his brother as he offered his marshmallow to be made into the rest. Chan chuckled as he looked at the color, of course Felix would go hard on such a little thing.

After all of that, they had all settled back into their places. The stars were out and shining as the sun had moved to a place where its shine couldn’t be directly seen from where they had been. Changbin had been tossing sticks into the fire for fun, maybe it was to see just how high the flames could get. No one really knew for sure.

“Hey Lix, hand me the plates.” Chan’s voice was a soft whisper in hopes to not bother the rest of the group. Felix nodded, his hands grabbing the plates to hand them over the fire. In theory it seemed like a fine and safe idea though he hadn’t announced his plan. So when Changbin had thrown in a particularly larger stick in, the flames pricked Felix’s skin enough to cause pain up his veins. Felix yelped softly, his hands tossing the plates towards Chan as his other hand grabbed his hand with a soft whine.

Changbin shot up from his seat as he grabbed Felix’s arm and pulled him to the side. Jeongin was in the middle of making his way up but slowly sat back down when Changbin had taken Felix off to the side. Chan was about to help too, his lips tugging into a frown as he picked up the plates instead. It wasn’t all that odd that Changbin would want to help but with Jeongin and Chan closer to him it was strange that he was the one who got to Felix first. Jeongin was right next to him and yet Changbin had jumped up and pulled him away.

Felix bit his lip to try not to cry like a huge baby in front of everyone. Changbin had grabbed his water bottle as he slowly poured his water onto the burn. “It’s super minor so cold water should help.” Felix nodded as he watched Changbin handle his hand with so much care it was as if it would break if he let it go.    
  
“Take your rings off, and keep this washcloth against your hand until the pain eases okay?” Felix nodded as he took the wet washcloth to his hand after he took his rings off and put them into his pockets. Once they both sat in the circle Go won whispered something into Changbin’s ear. Jeongin watched Felix sit down next to him again with a worried look.

Chan looked over at his brother for a bit before sighing softly. “Alright guys, that’s enough excitement for the night. Let’s try to get some rest.” Minho nodded as he pulled Jisung into their own tent, Changbin and Go won into their own and then there were the last three. Jeongin yawned as he nuzzled his head into Felix’s neck. Chan scooted over to his brother’s side, “How are you feeling?” Felix shrugged before offering his hand to look at. He knew Chan better, he wasn’t going to outright ask to see the wound so he can avoid babying Felix.

Chan inspected his brother’s hand before putting it down gently. “It doesn’t look bad, does it hurt anymore?” Felix shook his head as he moved to grab his rings again though Jeongin’s fingers took them away. “You should wait a bit to put these back on. It may hurt.” 

“Alright.” The three of them crawled into the tent, Felix laying in the middle of the two others. He laid there for what felt like hours unable to sleep. It wasn’t the rough ground under him or anything, it was just his dreams whenever he did fall asleep were awful. He’d open his eyes back up after a while with a deep frown. He eventually gave up and sat up in the tent. He thought about waking his brother up to talk about his nightmares like he usually would but he just looked so fast asleep he would have felt bad. He looked over at Jeongin but he couldn’t bring himself to waking him up either. 

He found himself crawling out of his tent and sitting in front of Changbin and Go won’s. He opened it a bit before softly whispering for the other. Changbin grumbled but after a few more alerting tones in Felix’s voice he woke up. His head meeting Felix’s by the door with a slightly tired look in his eyes.

“Felix what’s up? Why are you awake? It’s..” He looked down at his watch before sighing deeply. “It’s 2am.” Felix bit his lip nervously. He had no idea why he felt the need to go to Changbin in a time like this. It seemed more fitting to be at his brother’s side. Changbin unzipped the rest of his tent before gazing into Felix’s eyes with better light. The moonlight shining through his hair and giving his eyes a pretty glow almost. 

“What’s up?”

Felix jumped, he forgot that Changbin had asked that already. He cleared his throat as he softly spoke up. It was embarrassing that he had needed comfort from nightmares even at his age. He’d be off living alone eventually, would he need to call someone if this continued? Or would he be stuck like glue to Chan forever?

“I just..I can’t really sleep well without having a bad dream.” Changbin’s eyes crinkled as he smiled, his arms opening up for a hug for the younger. Felix gladly accepted it, his body falling into the embrace of the elder with a deep inhale. 

“Sorry it’s 2am and I came to you. I didn’t know why Chan wasn’t what I wanted.” His voice seemingly muffled by the fabric of Changbin’s sweatshirt, unclear if he could actually hear it or not. Changbin didn’t reply so it was a toss up, though his hand moved to rub the younger’s back so maybe he  _ did  _ hear Felix after all. They stayed like that for a bit, just breathing and Changbin’s hand rubbing the other’s back.

Felix had no idea when he ended up passing out in Changbin’s sleeping bag. Nor did he have any idea that the sleeping bag was big enough for two, but sure enough him and Changbin fit just perfectly. Their backs against each other as Changbin faced Go won. Once the light streamed through the tents window, Felix’s eyes slowly peeled open. Only then did he gather his surroundings. Though something had changed from the night before.

Changbin’s nose was buried into his neck and his arms wrapped around his waist. Felix glanced over his shoulder, his eyes meeting Go won’s. It was the most uncomfortable situation he’s ever been in. Her eyes were full of curiosity but Felix could see the hint of jealousy behind it all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AND WEEEEE'RE BACK! hope you enjoy this chapter! I SLAVED away so you guys can have an update! <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the one where chan loses his shit :(

“Hey. Good morning. I’ll just head out, hope you slept well.” 

Felix started to slide out of Changbin’s sleeping bag but the elder gripped his shirt and yanked his body back down. Felix wanted to sob as Go won’s expression didn’t hide her jealousy anymore. 

“Changbin.”

Her voice cut through the air, Felix couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable in the same space as her. He could understand why she would be acting this way though he couldn’t help but be nervous. Changbin had his head buried into his neck, they were unintentionally spooning and it probably looked bad without the context. Not like there was all that much context Felix could give to her without adding fuel to the flames.

Changbin eventually rolled over to look at his girlfriend with a tired look, his lips tugging into a frown as she glared down at him.

“What has you so mad this early in the morning? Did a spider climb into your sleeping bag and I didn’t wake up to kill it and now you’re annoyed?”

Go won rolled her eyes at the boy’s question before sighing. She was sure it was nothing to worry about but just seeing Felix so cuddly with  _ her  _ boyfriend was irritating. The two were getting closer and closer as the days progressed and at times it seemed like Changbin was more of a boyfriend to Felix than to her.

“Felix don’t you think Chan is worried about you not being in your tent?”

As if on cue the three heard Chan yell Felix’s name out. Changbin looked over at the other male that had been sitting next to him. He almost forgot Felix had fallen asleep and they shared his sleeping bag since he felt bad about his nightmares. Felix began to get up but he was stopped by Changbin’s grip on his arm. 

“Did you end up getting some sleep?”

His voice was so full of concern Felix would have felt bad if he didn’t answer despite how uncomfortable this situation was making him. He took one glance at Go won before looking back at Changbin with a small smile. 

“Yeah, sorry I woke you up so early. I should get going before Chan thinks I’m dead. Um..hope you slept well too Go won. I’ll see you guys later.” 

He slipped his arm out of Changbin’s grip as he stumbled out of Changbin’s tent. He ran his hands through his hair as he groaned under his breath. How was he supposed to face Go won after that? Did she think he was cheating on her? He dragged his hands down his face before poking his head into his own tent. Jeongin pulled him inside, his arms locking around Felix’s body as he spoke softly.

“Where were you? We were so scared something happened to you. Are you okay?” He moved away from the hug as he tried to search for any possible wounds. Chan’s voice rang through the air again before stopping when he opened the tent. 

“Oh, there you are. Where did you go? Are you okay? Where did you sleep? Did you sleep okay at least? Let me see your hand where you got burned. Does it still hurt? Why do you look like you’re about to cry? What happened?”

Felix blinked at all the questions thrown at him, his eyes watered as he couldn’t make up answers for some of them. He lifted his hand up for Chan to look at it but it wasn’t taken. Instead his body was pulled into another hug. He could feel his shoulders shake as the tears started to fall down his cheeks. He didn’t even know why he was crying. Was it just all the tension from Go won coming out as tears or was he generally upset?

“I just wanna go home, being outside sucks and I hate having to question if there’s a bug in my hair or if it’s Jeongin playing with it. I slept horribly. I wanna go home.”

Chan hummed as he hesitantly ran his hand through his brother’s hair. “Do you want to rest in the car while we pack up then? There’s some granola bars in the glove box if you’re hungry..if you want Jeongin can come too if it makes you more comfortable?” 

Felix wiped his eyes, it was stupid to be crying over a camping trip. He looked back at his boyfriend, their eyes meeting for a second before he looked away. “I’d feel bad if I fell asleep and not help you guys pack up. I can help.” 

He went to get out of their tent but Minho’s head popping into it stopped him. He moved to ruffle Felix’s hair before looking over at Chan with a smile.

“All packed up chief, ready to go whenever you guys pack up your tent.”

Chan smiled as he gave the other a thumbs up, his eyes looking back at his brother.

“Guess you don’t have to help at all, problem solved. Go get some rest.”

Felix signed, he couldn’t say no to Chan after Minho did everything he was trying to busy himself in hopes that it’ll make Chan less worried about him. He stepped out of his tent, his backpack resting on his back as he made his way to the parked car. Jisung pointed at him with a whine as if to complain but he used absolutely no words while doing so.

Chan swatted his hand away before starting to take down the tent with Jeongin as Jisung continued to complain. “How come he gets to go to the car without helping? I was kidnapped and forced into helping by my own boyfriend. Do you know how scary Minho is? He dragged me out of the tent and made me help him fold up said tent. The nerve of some people.”

No one felt an ounce of pity which only caused more whining from the younger until Minho had shut him up with a series of kisses. Felix never ended up falling asleep again, he just laid in the backseat as he waited for the rest to get in. Once everyone filed in he had sat up. Changbin ended up sitting next to him with Gowon on the other side of him. Jeongin sat in front of Felix and at times glanced over his shoulder to meet eye contact. Felix found it rather awkward but gave his boyfriend a small smile each time.

Once the ride was over and they all dispersed from Chan’s car and stood around talking with each other. Chan had pulled Changbin aside to say something and it looked rather serious but Felix felt as if it weren’t his business so he stayed put waiting for his brother to unlock their house.

* * *

“Changbin, can we talk for a sec...alone?” Chan eyed Gowon before she huffed softly and walked towards the crowd of people. Changbin faced the other with a slight frown as he tried to hide his worry. Chan sounded serious, like  _ way  _ serious.

“What’s up?”

Chan took a deep breath in as his mind tried to piece all the information together to form a sentence. “Listen, I’ve known for awhile now but..” His voice trailed. He had trouble finding the courage to tell his best friend the fact that he knew who his soulmate was. His teeth nervously nibbled his lip before he tried speaking again.

“Felix..he’s..he’s your soulmate. And! And I know you’re dating Gowon and he’s dating Jeongin so all that I ask is that you let him know and let him down gently.”

Chan seemed frazzled even more than Changbin. He smiled nervously as he watched Changbin’s expression change from confused to worried then fixing on a blank expression. 

“I see.”

Chan mentally hit himself on the head. Changbin sounded so disappointed in him, was it because he had hid it so long? He shifted his weight from his foot before starting to speak up again. 

“Can you just take him out somewhere, not a date or anything, and let him down easy? I’m sure he’s going to be devastated and I’m so sorry but I can’t bear watching Jeongin get hurt. Felix is so blinded by finding his soulmate that he can’t see that someone is already there wanting to make him happy.”

Changbin nodded slowly as he thought of ways he could drop the bomb on Felix. He supposes it all made sense now. Why Felix had been drawn to him and why Felix felt the safest around Changbin. He moved to pat Chan’s back as he spoke with a warm smile.

“Don’t stress Chan, I’ve got this.”

* * *

Felix sat on the steps of the house as he tiredly watched everyone start to leave for their own houses. Everyone but Changbin. He ended up sitting next to Felix, which was painfully awkward considering their night spent together along with the morning following.

“Felix would you like to hang out sometime? Like, without Chan.”

Felix turned to look over at the male next to him, when they usually hung out it was without Chan so what made this occasion notably different? Did Chan set them up again? Jeongin was getting tired of Felix always being away so should he refuse this offer? He sighed at his thoughts all bubbling at once. It made it impossible to answer the other’s question.

“Sure..”

He answered without thought, just like he always did. He just couldn’t help it with Changbin. He wished he knew why he couldn’t think with him around. Or why he just wanted to make sure Changbin always saw the best of him.

“Let’s go to that festival in town, can you meet me there at like 8? Then the stars would be out while you go on the rides you know?”

Felix smiled at the idea, it sounded amazing. He looked up at the sky above them, the afternoon glow making Changbin’s sky almost glow. He gave the other a thumbs up with a grin, his eyes following his body as Changbin got up and left. 

Chan finally made his way to the door, his fingers unlocking it before looking down at his brother. The younger seemed in heaven as he rested his head in his hands. 

“Come on Felix, come in before you catch a cold.”

The younger got up with a hum, his mind elsewhere as he walked past Chan to go into their house. Was this a date? It couldn’t be, they were both in relationships. They were both happy in them, weren’t they? Felix caught himself second guessing himself. His eyebrows furrowed as he tried to think if he was happy dating Jeongin. He was, wasn’t he?

He kept that thought close as he dressed himself the next day. His head was full of questions as he started to style his hair a bit. Has he ever dressed up for a date with Jeongin? He stared at himself in the mirror with that thought. His outfit seemed too cute for a casual meeting with a friend. It seemed as if he tried to look cute for someone. He shrugged it off as he started to walk out of the house.

“Out for a date Lix?”

Felix turned before shaking his head, “Is it too dressy? Should I change?”

Chan furrowed his eyebrow as he looked at his brother’s attire. He couldn’t figure out what had gotten into him. Who was he dressing up for? He prayed with his whole body that it wasn’t for Changbin. He couldn’t fathom how devastated he’d feel to be practically rejected by your soulmate looking that cute.

“You look good, have fun with whatever you’re doing. Be home before midnight or call me.”

Felix nodded before walking out the door. His shoes scuffed the sidewalk as he made his way to the festival. His heart raced with every step. His cheeks burning even with the cold nip of the air. His hands shoved into his pockets as he stared up at the sign of the festival. Once his eyes moved down he felt his heart sink into his shoes.

There stood Changbin but he wasn’t alone. He stood with Gowon. The two laughing at something as their hands clasped together. Felix didn’t know what he was expecting. Changbin had a girlfriend. He had a boyfriend. Why was he so disappointed? He turned on his heels, his body aching in the cold as he started to walk back. His lip trembled as tears slowly dropped from his eyes. Why was he so hurt by seeing them together? What was he thinking would come out of this night?

He slowly opened the door to his house to find it eerily quiet. He sniffled as he knocked onto Chan’s closed door. He was surprised to see it open so fast. He stared at his brother, something seemed off with him but he couldn’t help but spill his guts. 

“Ch-chan..I. I hate this! I don’t know what I was expecting when he invited me to hang out with him. Gowon is his  _ girlfriend _ ! I have a boyfriend. I just want this stupid feeling in me to go away! I don’t understand it. I want to see gray again, having a soulmate is nothing but torture!” He babbled on and on not even noticing his brother’s expression until his voice boomed through the hall.

“Felix shut up!”

Felix blinked away his shock, Chan has never even raised his voice at him once in their whole lifetime. He gulped back the lump in his throat as he tried to keep calm as Chan glared down at him.

“Changbin is your fucking soulmate but you need to let him go! He obviously chose Gowon and you should have chosen Jeongin! Quit toying with him if you can’t commit to him! It pains everyone to watch you be all cuddly with Changbin when you say you like Jeongin. Felix admit it! You like the idea of someone liking you. You don’t like Jeongin. You like the fucking idea of it. Grow up! I wish you never fucking met Changbin.” 

Before Felix could speak up Chan had slammed his door, the vase Felix had made with Changbin falling from it’s place on the end table falling to the ground. Felix’s eyes barely noticed the mark on Chan’s wrist when he slammed the door in his face. Chan had lost his soulmate? He moved to look over at the broken vase only to finally choke up his sobs. Changbin was his soulmate? He sat down by Chan’s door as he sobbed. It almost all fit into place. He couldn’t control anything around Changbin because the world had wanted them to be together. Why would the world send out Gowon and Jeongin to come in between them then? It didn’t make sense. He wiped his eyes in attempt to get rid of his tears but new ones only replaced them in seconds.

Chan sat against the other side of his door, his ears picking up every single sob from his brother. His body filled to the brim with regret. He’s never yelled at Felix before but he couldn’t help it. He had found the mark on his wrist while he was out. A missed opportunity to meet his soulmate before they had tragically died. His world to be forever grayscale. It’s a rare case that the world gives you a second soulmate. Chan doubted he’d be one of the very few to be given that chance. He sighed as he stayed put while listening to his brother’s sobs. His heart aching.

* * *

Changbin looked up at the sky, his feet standing on Gowon’s porch as he dropped her off at her apartment. His eyebrows furrowed as he thought about his plan for that night. Felix never showed. His mind tried to figure out what might have happened. He never even heard from the other telling him that he couldn’t come. It was a bit worrisome but he was sure he had some solid reason why he couldn't come. He was about to start walking home when his phone started buzzing in his pocket. His eyes scanned the caller ID before picking up in a heartbeat.

“Felix! Hey, what happe-” 

He was cut off but soft sobs from the other end of the line. Was Felix crying? What had happened? Was the reason he was crying the same for not showing up tonight? He took a deep breath before softly speaking into his phone.

“Should I come over?”

Changbin was now standing on Felix’s porch with the younger sobbing into his chest. His arms wrapped around the other as his chin rested on top of his head. He wondered what had Felix crying so hard, sure he was kind of a crybaby but he seemed absolutely emotionally wrecked. 

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Felix shook his head no. He seemed to calm down slightly, his sobbing became soft sniffling as he pulled away from the hug. His eyes were puffy as his fingers slowly wiped under them. He took a shaky breath in before turning to go back into his house.

“Wait-- Felix.” 

Changbin gripped his wrist as the younger looked back, his eyes wide with shock. Changbin smiled nervously. He couldn’t believe he was doing this, he fully knew that Felix was his soulmate and he had a girlfriend. He felt as if he owed Felix the world.

“Let’s get some ice cream.”

The two walked in silence as they ate their ice cream. The stars shining against Felix’s skin, he was beautiful. Changbin couldn’t help but stare. Felix must have noticed, his eyes moving from his ice cream to look in Changbin’s direction. 

They ended up sitting on a bench as Felix finished his ice cream. Changbin found himself staring at the stars with his head leaning on the younger’s shoulder. His thoughts only interrupted with the other spoke up.

“I should be getting home, Chan is probably somewhat worried.”

“Somewhat?”

Felix mentally cursed himself before looking over at the elder, “He kinda yelled at me. I’m okay now, I kinda deserved it. I was insensitive and of course made everything about me. I’m so childish..”

Changbin tapped their shoes against each other before pulling their bodies off the bench. 

“You still have growing up to do, it’s just life. I’m sure he loves you even when he yells at you. Chan deals with so much and he doesn’t even ask for anything in return. I don’t know how he does it. Don’t feel too bad, I’m sure he’ll be bawling his eyes out tomorrow apologizing.”

Felix hummed, their bodies back to walking side to side. He moved his hands to go into his pockets but one of them was stopped before it could make it. Changbin’s fingers intertwined with his as if it weren’t a big deal. Felix looked over at the other but he couldn’t quite make out the elder’s expression. He looked away with a dusting to his cheeks. His teeth biting on his lips to keep his smile down.

Changbin squeezed the other’s hand as he looked up at the sky. His lips tugged into a small smile. Maybe he could keep the fact that they were soulmates to himself. Chan was right, he would be completely and utterly destroyed. He couldn’t bare to think of Felix suffering anymore. And so, he’ll keep his mouth shut.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it always begins and ends with changbin ;)

Felix waved Changbin off before slowly opening the front door praying his older brother wasn’t on the other side. He let out a deep sigh of relief to find the house just as he left it. The only difference was that the broken pieces of the vase were picked up from their old spot on the floor by Chan’s room. 

Felix silently walked to his room before flopping onto his bed with a grown. His arms gripped the pillow close to his chest as his eyes wandered outside his window. His mind was jumbled to the brim with thoughts but he couldn’t even piece a single one together. 

Changbin being his soulmate made sense right? He gravitated to him naturally. Would that put a reason behind his actions? Would that even be a valid reason? What was he going to do with Jeongin? 

He rolled over to face the wall as he furrowed his eyebrows in deeper thought.

No, saying what is he going to do with him sounds like he’s a burden. It makes it sound like Jeongin is something he could just throw away. Was Chan right? He just liked the idea of someone liking him? Did he even truly like Jeongin back? How was he even supposed to bring this situation up to the younger? He was already annoyed that Felix kept hanging out with Changbin without a second thought.

He rolled over again with a frustrated groan. There was no happy ending in this was there? Someone’s bound to be hurt. Whether it be him or Jeongin. He’s in a relationship but the thought of Changbin rejecting their bond made his chest ache. He had to either let himself be torn down then get over it or keep up this act he’s trapped himself in with Jeongin. If he broke it off with Jeongin would he just end up hurting them both in the process? Would anyone get anything out of that outcome?

His hands moved up to tug his orange strands as he frowned. There was no good way of doing this, he would have to tell Jeongin and let him decide what he wants to do with that information. Felix let a low whine out as he pulled his blankets over his head. He decided he would tell the younger tomorrow. That was his plan.

* * *

Felix stared at himself in the mirror with a slight frown. His eyes having slight dark circles under them. He got absolutely no sleep. He was up all night just thinking. It started with how he would break it down to Jeongin then moved to Chan being so upset with him and trying to figure out how he would face him in the morning. He rubbed his eyes before sitting at his desk. His hands pulled out his makeup as he dabbed under his eyes. He prayed it was good enough to conceal his lack of sleep enough for the hawk eyes Chan seemed to have.

He slowly opened his door and peeked out from the small crack that he had made for himself. His brother was sitting at the kitchen table with his phone in his head. A bowl of cereal in front of him and an empty bowl for Felix across the table. Felix took a deep breath in before making his way to the cabinet they kept their cereal in.

“Good morning, Lix.”

“Mmhm..”

Felix had no idea what to say, he felt as if one wrong move and Chan would crack. He sat at the table keeping his eyes away from his brother’s as he poured himself his own helping of cereal. He scooped up a spoonful to put in his mouth but he stopped when Chan cleared his throat.

“Listen, I’m sorry I yelled at you yesterday. And..broke your vase. I just..I don’t know. There’s no excuse for taking it out on you. I’m sorry you had to find out everything about Changbin that way. I wanted him to tell you himself.”

Felix almost choked on his spoonful, Changbin knew too? Was that why he wanted to meet him at the festival? To let him down? But why would he bring Go won? That didn’t seem like him to let him know that they were soulmates right in front of her? Or maybe he wanted to prove to her he wasn’t interested in him?

“That’s kind of a dick move…”

Chan flinched at the sudden shift in his little brother. He hadn’t said a word to him and  _ that  _ was the first thing he said? He didn’t even know who it was targeted at. Was it for him? He scratched his neck as he stared at the younger.

“I can’t believe he was going to do that in front of her. What the fuck?”

Chan quirked an eyebrow up at Felix’s thoughts becoming verbal. He was going to tell the other to watch his language but he felt as if he didn’t have to micromanage Felix. He sighed softly as he pieced together what had been going through the younger’s mind. Changbin brought Go won with him to let Felix down? What happened to letting him down gently? Chan frowned as he moved to his own thoughts.

He couldn’t really scold Changbin for not going with the gentle approach, Chan himself yelled at Felix about the fact. That was definitely not a gentle way of going about telling him. It was obviously the exact opposite.

Felix ate the rest of his breakfast in silence as he practically glared holes into the wall behind Chan. The elder watched his emotions shift almost abruptly. Felix’s eyes softened as he placed his spoon back in his bowl with a frown.

“But that doesn’t seem like him..He wouldn’t do it then and be like, ‘see?’ he would probably just want to make her feel better about the camping trip since they haven’t hung out in a while? Maybe it was for the best that I didn’t end up going..”

Felix tilted his head as he rested his cheek in his palm. His eyes rolled before settling onto his brother. “How long did he know? How long did  _ you  _ know?”

Chan cleared his throat as he sat up from the table as he began to wash his dishes. “I found out when you both had similar stories when you first got color. I just didn’t know how to bring it up so I kept it to myself. I just told Changbin after the camping trip, I couldn’t help keeping it to myself and I knew he’d be able to let you down gently because you both were in a relationship. I didn’t want you cooped up in your room over it so I wanted him to tell you himself instead of hearing it from me but..obviously that did not work out.”

“Oh speaking of..how are you feeling about. You know..”

Felix took his brother’s wrist to further inspect the mark before quickly dropping it with a frown. 

“Sorry that was insensitive. I should have asked to look at it first, you may not have been ready to speak about it.”

Chan sighed deeply before offering his wrist to his brother to look again. 

“It’s fine, I blew up on you. You deserve to know why. I think I remember the moment too and I guess that’s what got to me. He was a friend of Minho’s that I talked to maybe once or twice. We obviously never touched so we never found out. The music note..it makes me think it was him. I wrote music for a select few. It would just make sense that that’s what it was hinting at you know?”

Felix hummed as he traced the symbol with his finger before dropping Chan’s wrist once again. He looked up at his brother with a frown. He had to live his life forever in the boring gray tone. The same one Felix had claimed he wanted back that night. It made sense what had struck a nerve with Chan. 

“I wasn’t saying things to help your case. I understand why you blew up.”

Felix paused for a moment debating if he should say anything more but he ended up just staying silent in the end. His mind too full about his plans for the day to say much about past endeavors. 

“I’m going out by the way, I’ll be back later. If I’m all emotional when I come back just ignore it. I thought a lot about this last night. Don’t stress.”

Chan craned his neck before rubbing his thumb under Felix’s eye. “Is that why you look like death? Did you get any sleep last night? Make sure you get some sleep tonight okay? Go to bed early.”

Felix flinched at the sudden movement from his brother. Of course he noticed his makeup under his eyes, did he wipe it off? He moved to the bathroom as he stared at himself in the mirror. His makeup was still on but now he was doubting how realistic it looked. He leaned closer to the glass with a deep frown. Chan stood in the doorway before sighing softly.

“I only noticed it because your freckles were covered.”

Felix looked over at his brother before looking back at his reflection. “Should I draw on fake ones? I don’t want everyone thinking I’m a zombie.”

Chan chuckled before moving his brother from his spot in the bathroom. His hands rested on the younger’s shoulders with a small smile. 

“You look fine, not everyone knows every little detail of your face. I grew up with you Felix. What kind of brother would I be if I didn’t know how my little brother looked?”

“I guess… Okay whatever, I’m going out.”

Felix waved the other away as he walked out of the house. His heart pounded in his chest as he pulled out his phone to call Jeongin. He put the phone to his ear as he started walking towards the younger’s house. Jeongin picked up in a matter of seconds, his eagerness to answer almost pained Felix to tell him what he wanted to.

“Hey Innie..I have something to just talk over with you. Can we meet somewhere?”

Jeongin agreed with a little too much enthusiasm which felt like a thousand knives in Felix’s back. Felix hung up with a low sigh as he made his way to the park they said they’d meet at. He sat on one of the swings and waited for the younger. He rested his body against one of the chains as he started to think about how he was going to break this to the younger. He couldn’t help but to think about how much trouble he went through to confess to him. His lips parted as his mind moved to how he had his first kiss with the younger. How was he supposed to forget that?

Jeongin appeared out of nowhere, his arms wrapping around Felix’s body as his head popped over his shoulder. 

“Hey! Whatcha thinking about Lixie? You seem really deep in thought, are you okay? You seemed kinda upset on the phone. You look upset..what happened?”

“We...we need to talk Jeongin.” 

Felix turned to the younger before taking a shaky breath in. He gripped the chains of the swing before meeting eye contact with the other.

“I found out who my soulmate is. By that I mean Chan told me and..” He paused as he tried to figure out how he could lay it down gently but he couldn’t figure it out. He just had to say it.

“It’s Changbin.”

Jeongin sat on the other swing, well actually it was more of a plop. He seemed drained of his normal energy as his fingers gripped the chains. 

“I figured as much, when you kept hanging out with him. I just didn’t want to say anything and ruin anything between you two.”

Felix rested his cheek against the chains, the cold metal sending shivers up his spine. “Yeah well, that’s what I wanted to talk about. I don’t know how I feel about it. I can’t help myself around him and I feel like I’m just dragging you along. Chan had said something and I’m scared he’s right. I don’t know if I like you or I just like the idea of someone actually liking me. For now..I want to focus on figuring out the answer so I think…”

“We should break up?”

Felix’s chest ached as he heard Jeongin’s voice crack. He was too much of a coward to meet eye contact with him, his eyes glued to his shoes. He opened his mouth to answer but Jeongin had cut him off.

“I don’t know why I thought I could compete against your soulmate. We were a train wreck waiting to happen. I should've known I was dumb for hoping you had liked me. I’ll see you later Lix.”

Felix looked up just as Jeongin had gotten off of his swing and walked away. Felix couldn’t bring himself to get up and run after him. He didn’t deserve to run after the younger anyways. He deserved to sit on the swing alone. An hour had passed before he had gotten up from the swing, his feet scuffing in the dirt of the playground. His white shoes quickly turned a light brown as he shuffled in a slow walk. He ended up back at home but he didn’t want to walk in. He just sat on the porch with his head resting in his hands. His knees pulled up to his chest as he thought about what had gone down at the park. 

Jeongin had never said they were broken up officially but he could probably assume Jeongin hadn’t wanted to continue dating when he heard what Felix had to say. He let out a long sigh as he pulled up Jeongins contact. His thumb ran through their text messages aimlessly, as if he was trying to find the exact moment he started to stray away from the younger. 

He typed out a message apologizing how he had told the younger but as he went to send it he noticed something. His thumb hit send but it never said it was delivered. He tilted his head before trying to send another. The same result had happened. Did Jeongin block his number? He bit his lip before trying to call the younger but it went straight to voicemail. There was no way his phone was dead, Jeongin always had his phone charged. He had to get an insider opinion.

Felix had gotten up from his spot as his phone was pressed to his ear, a voice answering with a tired sound to it. “Jisung wake up it’s literally almost noon. I need you for something, meet me at the cafe. I’ll treat you to coffee or whatever so you can wake up a bit.”

The other agreed and the two met at their usual spot. Jisung drank his coffee as Felix had tried sending a few texts to Jeongin. None of them were going through. What he was about to do was desperate but he had to know if he was truly blocked.

“Can you text Jeongin?”

Jisung tilted his head as he stared at the other curiously. “Is your phone broken? Why am I texting him? Do you want me to say something in particular? Isn’t he  _ your  _ boyfriend? What’s up Lix.”

“It’s complicated just..ask him how he’s doing.”

Jisung frowned but did as he was told, his fingers typing away before setting his phone down to watch the message send. Felix’s eyes were glued to the screen. His heart sinking as he watched the small ‘delivered’ show up under Jisung’s message. It was soon replaced with a tiny ‘read’. Jisung looked over at Felix before picking up his phone again. 

“He says he’s okay. Why, what happened between you two? Why aren’t you asking him?”

“I think we broke up.”

Jisung quickly pulled Felix into a hug as he sighed deeply. “Oh Felix..”

“It’s my fault, I take full blame. I just..never thought he’d block me.” 

Jisung blinked as shock ran through him at lightning speed. Did he hear that right? Jeongin blocked Felix? The youngest in their group actually had a mean bone in his body? He didn’t know how to comfort the younger or even if he wanted the comfort.

“I don’t know what I want anymore Jisung, wouldn’t it be so much easier if the world had paired me up with no one? I don’t deserve to call someone my soulmate. I only do stupid things without thinking and the one time I do something and have actual thought behind it I end up hurting someone. I guess I deserve to be blocked, I’d want to block myself too. Get everything out of my head. I’m nothing but horrible for him, he deserved so much better and I let him down.”

“I know you’re distressed Felix but you can’t just pin everything on yourself. I don’t want everyone to be hurt. No breakup is harmless, someone is going to get hurt. It’s unavoidable. Just think of that okay? Don’t pin so much on yourself..I wish I could say more but Minho needs me. I don’t wanna stand you up or anything. I just never trust Minho’s ideas unsupervised. Call me if you need anything okay?”

With that Jisung had left Felix sitting at the table in silence. He played with their straw wrappers as he tried to think of what he wanted. Did he want Changbin to accept him as his soulmate or did he just want to be someone’s. His head was racing with thoughts, his head throbbed. He felt so drained emotionally and physically. He went back home and paced his room, his teeth nibbling his nails until they were nubs. His mind was empty of thoughts, he couldn’t think anymore. He lost track of time as he paced. His body ending up on the living room couch, his head resting against the pillows that stayed there for decoration.

He fell asleep at some point, he woke up to the sound of Chan starting the car. He was probably off to go hang out with some friends but Felix was too late to question anything. He sat up slowly, his eyes moving to the clock. It was already night time. A note stuck to the door explaining where Chan was going and when he’d most likely be back. Felix sighed as he left the house after thirty minutes of just aimlessly walking around the house.

He got out his bike and found his way to the bookstore. He hadn’t really planned to end up there but he just gravitated there. He sat on his bike staring at the bookstore for a moment before getting off and putting his bike away in the rack. He fished his set of keys out from his jacket, his fingers slowly unlocking the building.

He paced the aisles, his fingers running along the spines of the books before stopping at one in particular. His favorite of course but he didn’t seem to want to pull it out and read it anymore. He stared out the window he sat at to read normally. He moved to sit there. His thoughts started rolling then, why wasn’t he hurt about this breakup? The only thing bothering him was the fact that he was blocked.

The world was treating him a bit too nicely, it seemed unfair that Jeongin was probably suffering and he was sitting just fine. He leaned his body against the wood with a frown. The moonlight shined on his skin but he felt as if he wasn’t able to admire it. He didn’t even remember moving his hands but his ears picked up on the facetime ring.

His eyes glanced at his screen before gasping as Changbin’s face appeared with a slightly worried expression. His voice rang through Felix’s ears as he just stared back at the other in silence.

“Felix? You alright? You look like you’ve just seen a ghost. And you know, if you did you’re screwed cuz there’s no way in hell I’m saving you. You called the wrong guy pal.”

Felix couldn’t manage to speak, his words caught in his throat. What was it he wanted from Changbin? He wasn’t someone he was able to have for himself. He didn’t know why he kept sticking to him like this when he knew it wouldn’t work out.

“Felix? Hey, you’re stressing out. What’s wrong? For real, what’s going on in your brain? Tell me what you’re thinking.”

“I think I want something that I’ll never have.”

Changbin shifted himself as he stared at his phone once Felix blurted out a sentence. Changbin rested his head in his palm as he stared at the younger. The moonlight hitting his face almost perfectly. It almost made it hard to focus on what the younger had been saying to him.

“I think I broke up with Jeongin earlier today and I guess it’s just not affecting me as much as it should and I’m worried about it. I’m scared something is clouding my judgement and I know it’ll only hurt me in the end but I can’t help it. It’s all I seem to want and I have no idea how to get rid of that said want. It’s never going to be fulfilled and..”

“I’m guessing Chan told you?”

Felix flinched, his eyes finally meeting Changbin’s from the other side of his camera. His look said it all. He knew. Changbin sighed as he shifted his weight in the chair he had been sitting in. 

“I don’t know what to say Felix. We both know I’m dating Go won. I really don’t want to hurt you but I’m happy with her right now. Let’s just not talk about it, I don’t want to rub salt in the wound. I don’t want to hurt you ever Felix.”

“I don’t know what to do anymore Changbin…”

Changbin’s heart dropped as he watched Felix’s expression become so hurt in a matter of seconds. He managed to hurt Felix even by saying he didn’t want to do such a thing. He cursed at himself internally before starting to speak to the younger again.

“I think you should start over with your love life, instead of reliving all the bad memories you’ve had. Take a chance to slow down and think out all your actions. You’re still young, of course your first relationship ends up more of an experiment than an actual real thing.”

Felix hummed as he listened to Changbin talk for a while before ending up on a different topic somehow. “Hey, where even are you right now?”

“The bookstore, why?”

Changbin pursed his lips before looking at the younger with a worried expression. “Is the door locked? You’re all alone and it’s night time, it’s almost midnight. Why are you there anyways?”

“I just needed to get some fresh air and ended up here. And yeah, the doors locked. I locked it when I came in. Not like anyone would know anyone’s in here since all the lights are off and no one comes out around here at night.”

Felix looked at his camera before setting his phone down by his legs. Leaving Changbin to look up at the ceiling. 

The two talked aimlessly for the rest of the night until Felix’s body ended up sliding down the wall and resting in a position he was comfortable in. His eyes shut as his chest rose and fell slowly. Changbin watched him fall asleep, he noticed the younger was getting sleepy when his replies seemed softer and softer but he never would have guessed Felix would fall asleep on call. He thought they’d just call it a night and say goodbye. He stared at the other’s sleeping face as the moonlight shined along his face. It was a gorgeous site really, the light shimmering along his hair. 

Changbin laid his head on his desk as he slowly fell asleep to the sound of Felix’s breathing.

It was getting harder and harder everyday to stay away from such a boy when he had so much power over Changbin. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SO BAD AT UPDATING IM SO SORRY LOL

**Author's Note:**

> If you're a new reader of mine, hello! I'm yoon hehe,if you enjoyed feel free to follow me on twt !  
> @johfamwrld
> 
> If you're a returning reader of mine, hi how are ya ;0 u should still follow me on twt hehe muah ily guys! enjoy !


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